Field Notes

Chaos and the Caterpillar

Mon, 13 Jan 2025 18:54:59 GMT

Our Hidden Purpose is to Transform

and be Reborn as a Butterfly

Abbott Handerson Thayer (1849-1921)

Where have I been?

Looking back at my online blog, I realize it’s been over two years since I’ve posted! Whoa! It’s not for lack of fodder for sharing but out of necessity to finish my Ph.D. Its completion has been a long time coming, and my immersive experience in the latter part of the process was not merely a means to an end; it has meaningful implications for my work going forward.

While I intend to continue seeing clients, I am now broadening my endeavors to affect vast swaths of people. My past experience (18 years) as a public school teacher and university educator and the last 27 years as a healing professional have coalesced into a divinely inspired mission. Let me explain where I’m coming from and my intentions. (This blog post incorporates portions of my doctoral dissertation).

World Chaos

Undeniably, the world is in turmoil on many levels. While inconclusive, researchers propose several factors that may be responsible for impending ecological, economic, and societal collapse. These include the degradation of the environment and climate change, inequality and oligarchy, complexity and bureaucracy, overexploitation of resources, population crash, polarizing politics, and identities over issues. External shocks also emerge as catalysts for collapse. These include attacks, epidemics, and disasters (Spencer, 2021; Doll, 2023). “Collapse is a tipping point phenomenon when compounding stressors overrun societal coping capacity.” (Kemp, 2019).

Bureaucratic organizations such as the World Economic Forum are planning external systems of authority to enforce behaviors and ideologies, ostensibly to make society resilient to collapse. However, according to researchers, this type of externally imposed resiliency doesn’t apply to social systems (Davidson, 2010). When I speak of social systems, I mean how people and organizations interact and relate to one another to create a functioning whole. Family units, communities, workplaces, religious groups, nations, and educational institutions can all be considered social systems.

Amidst the discussion of preventing societal collapse, the concept of agency emerges as a crucial element. When we have agency, we feel in control of ourselves and the direction of our lives. We hold faith that we can handle anything. Recognizing our capacity to influence our own thoughts and behavior, we can remain stable yet flexible in the face of conflict or change (Pattinson, n.d.). In essence, we are the authors of our own lives. This sense of agency is a powerful tool in the face of potential collapse.

Light in the Darkness

The good news is that this chaos can be seen in a completely different light. Increasing numbers of people are becoming aware that a new world is emerging in our midst, and the force of humanity’s collective unconscious urge to evolve is becoming more deliberate.

This can be likened to the process to a caterpillar becoming a butterfly.

The breakdown of the caterpillar’s old system is essential for the breakthrough of the new butterfly. Yet, in reality, the caterpillar neither dies nor disintegrates; from the beginning, its hidden purpose was to transform and be reborn as the butterfly.

— (Hubbard, 2015, pp. 12-13).

Congruent to the butterfly analogy, the collective chaos and disintegration we experience could be an impetus for profound, positive change.

People worldwide are experiencing separation, turmoil, and chaos, and they lack the tools to empower themselves (develop agency) and strengthen healthy social systems. Initiatives and innovations grounded in living within a holistic system of relationships—relationship to self, to others, and to that which is greater than oneself—are urgently needed. The populace is awakening to the realization that they need, want, and deserve something greater. They may be unable to name it, but they can feel it stirring within.

Within is the operative word here. How do we shift from dependence on the intellect-based ‘outer’ authority to the heart-based wisdom of ‘inner’ knowing? Inner knowing underlies our Divinely imbued Heart-centered experiences of inspiration, intuition, and imagination to discover, create, and problem-solve in deeply fulfilling, compassionate, and meaningful ways. New forms of expression, wisdom, and compassion can come together, giving us, among other things, new opportunities for learning and new models of inspired education that address inner development.

Current Initiatives

The Inner Development Goals (IDG) Foundation, a not-for-profit and open-source initiative, was introduced to complement and accelerate external approaches to solving world problems by fostering inner development within individuals, groups, and organizations. It plays a crucial role in working to fulfill the UN’s Sustainable Development Goals (SDGs), a comprehensive plan for a sustainable world by 2030 (Inner Development Goals, n.d.). They recognize that science alone cannot solve the various world problems leading to potential collapse.

The film on their website explains that human beings have many different dimensions and that the answers to world problems are within them. “For the last few hundred years, we have been focused on the external world, but we have come to a point where the outside perspective has to be complemented by an inside perspective…We need a spiritual and cultural transformation” (Inner Development Goals, 2021).

While IDG is strategically designed to work with adults as individuals or within groups and organizations for planetary and societal healing, other holistic inner development approaches are also emerging.

One example comes from Janae Weinhold, PhD, a specialist in developmental trauma and the author of LOVEvolution: A Heart-Centered Approach for Healing Developmental Trauma. Her work centers on “love and the role of the heart in human evolution” (Weinhold, 2017, p. 5). Weinhold believes that “unconditional love is the most powerful energy force in the universe, with the potential to advance humanity to a new and more evolved species” (Weinhold, 2017, p.5).

Her work aims to heal the internal splits that developed in early childhood so people can open their hearts, become more integrated, experience coherent states of consciousness, and connect with themselves, others, and the cosmos (Weinhold, 2017, back cover). While our approaches are different, this is also the aim of my work with individual clients.

These innovations are examples of ground-breaking new directions and are imperative to evolving out of the dilemma of our threatened societal stability. Most inner development opportunities are geared toward adults, either those seeking solutions to world problems or those seeking to heal themselves and others and experience a shift toward wholeness.

Must we wait for impending collapse or the need for personal or planetary healing to address the inner dimensions? Is this only an adult endeavor? I propose it is not. Knowing who we are and accessing our True Self is crucial to our highest expression of existence in form and being fully human.

Multidimensionality—We are More than We Know

We often use external factors to define our identity, but the fully human self is much more than that. Being multidimensional, it holds multiple dimensions or levels of awareness. Each dimension is a focus of energy (light and information) within the mind, where we can potentially perceive ourselves within a recognizable reality. Each self exists with infinite points of focus simultaneously.

However, we can remain limited to only perceiving dimensions of outer reality through the five senses, while the rest remain disconnected from our perception. This is because we primarily perceive through conditioned beliefs acquired through outside authorities such as educational systems, religion, mainstream media, parents, and society (Gestalt Reality, n.d.).

In addition, discovery, or our beliefs about discovery, is trapped in a feedback loop where each generation does not look into a novel field of possibilities with fresh eyes. They look with a reconception of what they expect to find. They make the necessary interpretations they are “supposed” to make—essentially trapped into making—by their predecessors.

However, stretching our imagination, thinking beyond the usual, and becoming more aware of and interacting with new levels of awareness inspires and opens the self to more light, information, and the wisdom of inner knowing. We can learn how we impact ourselves, others, and the world by addressing our multidimensional selves as part of the whole field of unlimited energy and information.

My Inspiration

Awakening to one’s True Self and establishing an internalized center of authority requires a journey inward to explore these hidden parts. This endeavor is not widely experienced or understood, and while some do this naturally, most people need tools, guidance, and a safe place to explore.

Education, as a significant element of the social system, could act as a bridge to a heart-centered model that addresses the Whole Self with its many dimensions. This could be the path to develop the wisdom necessary to manage personal and planetary change and create a new way of being within our burgeoning multidimensional world.

I discerned that a holistic, heart-based, inner-development program for Kindergarten through twelfth grade (K-12) could be the best way to bring this shift to the masses, empowering our citizens to live and create from their divinely imbued nature. I am developing a program that aims to guide learners on a journey of self-discovery, empowering them to understand themselves multidimensionally and become their own authority. Nothing like this currently exists.

My Research

I used a unique inquiry approach to illuminate my experiences and perspectives. I also interviewed eight educators who were deeply engaged in their own inner development to discover emergent themes. Almost magically, the themes coalesced into a model of the multidimensional self and revealed an inspired pedagogical approach (methods of teaching) to provide the framework for developing these capacities. I have called it “I’M ME” (the Integrative Multidimensional Model of Empowerment © ). The wheel seen here depicts the multidimensional themes.

I’M ME

Integrative Multidimensional Model of Empowerment

There is more than meets the eye in this model. It is active and alive. Heart-centered knowing is a divine birthright. At its core, all one needs is already inside and accessible through the heart’s openness and awareness. As a representation of the heart, the circular nature of the wheel and its sectors may appear two-dimensional; however, it is not a static structure but fluid, moving, and changing.

Wheels, even two-dimensionally, denote a spinning movement. The model is merely a construct on the level of form to represent the otherwise abstract, fluid, undulating toroidal field of the multidimensional self.

Because we live in a world of form, we usually need form to make meaning or guide us until, ultimately, we don’t. We must start where we are. The design is a holistic architecture that creates a bridge from the world of form to the invisible field of the heart.

A New Learning Paradigm

My study was the first step toward developing this structure—a conceptual model and theory that will be used to design and build an educational platform. This framework incorporates various aspects of multidimensionality and a specialized pedagogical (related to methods of teaching) process to foster heart intelligence and cultivate a strong sense of self. The I’M ME model and theory that evolved from my research will provide direction and clarity to guide my work in developing a solid foundation for the heart-centered inner development program.

Given the supposition that few people achieve this heart-centered knowing and that no comprehensive system exists to educate and assist humanity in its fulfillment, the program's goal is to optimize the potential to experience life lived more fully human, with greater awareness, inner sovereignty, deep perception, and the inspired actions that arise from the heart and a strong, stable inner being.

The I’M ME model and theory are paramount to elucidating the big picture so others who are magnetized to these ideas can join in this movement, creating rich, meaningful content within this novel pedagogical approach and making it available for all our children.

This is not just about creating a holistic educational approach because it is potentially trendy or alternative. It is about:

Evolving the consciousness of the inhabitants of this planet.
Intervening before the blocks in consciousness that have plagued generations with perpetuated trauma, oppression, and misplaced power take hold.
Restoring access to our Divinely imbued intelligence of the heart.
Empowering our children with spiritual sight and the necessary tools to consciously lead their lives according to their own wisdom within our complex world.

It proposes a foundational shift from the predominant emphasis on head-centered “outer” knowing to balance with heart-centered “inner” knowing and the transformation of education in our rapidly shifting world.

Future Vision

I have a lot to develop now: a book dedicated to inspiring the masses with this new learning paradigm, a manual for those who are magnetized to create learning content, and an online platform that acts as a hub for content creators to offer their unique inner development curriculum and for interested parties to purchase.

In the future, I dream that these creative new curricula and instructional approaches will attract new types of “wisdom” teachers and influence future education policymaking. Perhaps this specialized program and process could impact teacher education and the types of individuals with professional characteristics, qualities, and skill sets who would be drawn to the profession.

The eventual I’M ME program aims to transcend all cultures and religious affiliations, ensuring that any interested party can implement it, be it individuals, groups, schools, or school districts anywhere in the world. This inclusivity is a crucial aspect of the proposed educational revolution, making it a new way to educate that is open to all.

Implications for My Readers

This endeavor is quite involved, and it will take some time to be ready to present to the public. While I have no intention of revealing it in any other forum, I have decided to entrust my readers as sacred partners to hold the vision with me. You will be privy to my process along the way as I plan to highlight the themes under development in ways that can be applied to your inner growth journey. Thanks for holding the Light for the potential of mass transformation and "flight!"

Just when the caterpillar thought her life was over,

she began to fly.

— Chuang Tzu

Odilon Redon (1840-1916)

References

Davidson, D. J. (2010). The applicability of the concept of resilience to social systems: Some sources of optimism and nagging doubts. Society & Natural Resources, 23(12), 1135–1149. https://doi.org/10.1080/08941921003652940

Doll, K. (2023, December 10). [Website]. Is society collapsing? Signs of the West’s potential downfall. Shortform. Retrieved from https://www.shortform.com/blog/is-society-collapsing/

Gestalt Reality. (2013, May 10). [Website]. The multidimensional self. Retrieved from https://www.gestaltreality.com/2013/05/22/the-multidimensional-self/

Hubbard, B. M. (2015). Conscious evolution: Awakening the power of our social potential. New World Library.

Inner Development Goals. (n.d.). [Website]. Retrieved from https://innerdevelopmentgoals.org/ .

Kemp, L. (2019, February 18). [Website]. Are we on the road to civilization collapse? BBC. Retrieved from https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20190218-are-we-on-the-road-to-civilisation-collapse

Pattison Professional Counseling and Mediation Center (n.d.). [Website]. Take control of your life: The concept of agency and its four helpers. Retrieved from https://www.ppccfl.com/blog/take-control-of-your-life-the-concept-of-agency-and-its-four-helpers/#:~:text=Agency%20is%20the%20sense%20of,face%20of%20conflict%20or%20change .

Spencer, C. (2021, July 16). [Website]. MIT predicted society would collapse by 2040. New data tells how we’re doing. Changing America. Retrieved from https://thehill.com/changing-america/sustainability/climate-change/563497-mit-predicted-society-would-collapse-by-2040/

Weinhold, J. B. L. (2017). A Heart-centered approach for healing developmental trauma. CICRCL Press.

The Physics of Fear

183:799260884 (Susan Newman) — Mon, 28 Mar 2022 03:36:00 GMT

A Path Out of Fear, Anxiety & Anger

At the Mercy of My Circumstances

Many years ago, when I was a young teacher in my 20s, I had what I would have considered at the time the worst experience of my life. As a typical firstborn, I was a rule follower and a high achiever. I received various accolades from my district, administrators, parents, and students for my creative and effective instructional techniques. I was even selected and ceremoniously recognized as one of the outstanding teachers in the district one year. However, the following year marked the most horrible year of my life, professionally. One of the worst possible things, in my mind, that could happen was to get “in trouble” for doing something “bad,” so I was constantly efforting always to be good, do my best, dot all my Is, and cross all my Ts.

To make a long story short, I had a student with a completely irrational and marauding mother whose reputation preceded her. For years, this woman relished using her writing skills to wreak havoc on her children’s teachers. The file of all her letters of complaint to the principal had become over an inch thick by the time her youngest reached my classroom. Word had it that her letters caused a previous principal to be fired unjustly. I wasn’t concerned because I was “such a good teacher.” She wouldn’t have a problem with me! My principal intentionally placed her child in my classroom for that reason and said she’d have my back. But before the school year began, that principal was transferred to a new school, and the incoming principal turned out to be a most unprincipled and devious woman, who not only didn’t have my back but made a point to throw me under the bus with this parent to save her own hide.

Actually, all was well until one day in late fall, I made the mistake of not writing a note back when this mother let me know her child was a little sleepy that day, and the wrath began. It was unbelievable! There were nasty complaining letters to me nearly every other week, copies to the principal, and even a letter to the board of education one time! She could turn any neutral, nebulous thing into something to write about, attempting to get me into trouble. OMG! My worst fears had become manifest! I was wracked with fear and anxiety every day. I had difficulty functioning; I couldn’t eat much or sleep for nearly the entire year. Later I became furious with the principal for lying, ignoring my requests for support, and undermining my best efforts. I wondered, “Why is this happening?” and “Why won’t this end?” I talked about it incessantly with other teachers, my loved ones, and other professionals, looking for a solution, a savior, a way to be rescued. One never came until I had a baby and quit to stay home and focus on mothering. But that wasn’t really a solution; it was just an escape route.

I didn’t have the tools to cope with the fear, anxiety, and anger I faced back then. In hindsight, I can see how the administrator and the district didn’t really take this woman seriously. This problem was more about my own perception of the experience than about the truth of the situation. Also, I didn’t understand the physics of fear and how I was actually perpetuating the problem with my thoughts and actions. Most significantly, I didn’t know that the more I focused on the problem, the more I got the problem. I’d never heard the sayings, “What you think about, you bring about.” “What you focus on expands.” or “Thoughts in mind, produce after their kind.”

I also didn’t realize that solutions to problems can never be solved on the level they are created. This mother functioned at a low vibration, likely out of her own fears and unresolved traumas, or her inability to source and maintain her own energy. Sometimes, creating negative emotions in others is a temporary energy fix, and it becomes addictive. But I was also trying to find a solution from a low vibration—a place of fear, not from a place of empowerment. I was addicted to talking about it—constantly attempting to source a solution outside myself because I didn’t have the tools or wherewithal to source the resolution from within.

Sometimes learning is about seeing and experiencing the non-exemplar, meaning, you learn by understanding what the concept is NOT. Now I realize that I had to understand what it’s like not to have solutions and do it all wrong, so I could discern how the solutions with extraordinary efficacy were always inside me later on. It’s also what has inspired me to teach others these principles to have more control over their fears, anxiety, and anger. As the saying goes, I wouldn’t wish the way I felt that year on my worst enemy (P.S., I don’t have any enemies…that I know of).

Our Collective Fear

While everything is relative, my experience with fear and anxiety could be considered trivial compared to what many have and are facing these days. Many have fear and anxiety because of unresolved past trauma, the most damaging being chronic childhood trauma from physical or emotional abuse or neglect, sexual abuse, living with an alcoholic parent, or in a household with domestic violence. Children who do not grow up in a safe environment develop a belief system that the world is not safe and their brain and bodies stay in a hypervigilant, over-aroused, and fearful state. This is also true of people who experience trauma as adults.

Anxiety is a natural experience unless it occurs regularly, in which case it can have a devastating effect on our consciousness, energy, and our ability to think. Chronic anxiety breaks down our energy field like a thousand tiny cuts. On the other hand, chronic fear is like a hatchet that keeps us separate from ourselves, others, and life in general. When someone is in fear, they withdraw, shrink, or become paralyzed. Their energy pulls inward to protect themselves, and their breathing becomes shallow.

We have a global situation where we are experiencing collective fear and anxiety. An extreme version of fear became embedded in the collective consciousness of the world as the circumstances of the last two years or more caused the masses to shut down their lives. In parallel to individual fear affecting the physical body, the entire civilization withdrew from everyday life and stayed inside. Our free movements were paralyzed, and masks inhibited our breathing.

Besides personal circumstances that may instigate fear, anxiety, and anger, the entire world is plagued by fears about health, family safety, finances, and uncertainty about the future. And now, without the ability to fully process and release the previous fear, the collective attention has been thrust into fear and anger with news broadcasts of Russia and Ukraine. The mass emotions of fear, anxiety, and anger have been collectively maximized with these global situations.

The Physics of Fear

It is often said that Love is the opposite of fear. The truth is that anger is the opposite of fear. While fear causes withdrawing inward, anger moves outward in bursts of attack. Wherever we have fear, anger is near; if we see anger, fear is behind it. Fear and anger have opposite poles and are drawn together like powerful magnets holding our consciousness in a low vibration. This low vibration makes us vulnerable to other negative influences.

Fear and anger require justification to exist. The mass emotions of fear and anger have been maximized by these worldwide circumstances, especially as a high level of suffering and death are perpetuated by the media. We see frightening images and headlines and hear provocative stories and our fear and anger seem justified.

But is that a trap? Do we really want to lower our vibration? Will that help anyone? Wouldn’t we and others be better served if we acted from the vibration of Love and compassion?

The consciousness of Love vibrates extraordinarily high. Love has no opposite. It is omnipotent (all-powerful), omnipresent (everywhere present at all times), and needs no justification. This high vibration of Love attracts support, safety, and happiness when our minds align with it. This is the operative concept: We must bring our minds to the Light of Love. We cannot expect it to seek us out and change us.

Chronic fear, anxiety, and anger take away our experience of wholeness, certainty, and the feeling of being in control. So how do we reach the vibration of Love and compassion if we have difficulty maintaining full command over fear, anxiety, and anger? That may feel like a tall order if we don’t have the tools amidst the doom and gloom of misery and hopelessness, with no end in sight.

We Can Bring Control Back to Ourselves.

First, know that our thoughts trigger fears. When we think that we are in danger, fear is generated. To reduce fear and anxiety, we need to spend less time thinking about our lack of safety and more time thinking about the possibility of positive outcomes.

Stephen Covey, the author of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People , created a simple model of three concentric circles that we can use to adjust our thinking and reduce feelings of fear, anxiety, and anger. The innermost circle is the Circle of Control , and it represents matters where our choices have a direct impact. These might include where we live, friends we spend time with, what we buy, what we eat, how much we sleep, what we think, or what we watch and read.

Place your focus here. Be mindful and proactive in these areas where you have direct control. Make choices that will uplift you, support your health and well-being, and strengthen your connections with others. Making the best choices won’t always be easy, but this is an area where you are completely in charge.

The outermost circle, the Circle of Concern , includes everything that impacts us. Some of these concerns represent all the areas of our lives over which we have no control. Examples in this area could be our past decisions/choices/behavior, the news, government activities, natural disasters, the environment, the economy, war, and death. If we find ourselves fixated on any of these issues that are out of our control, we become reactive and could find ourselves in a highly anxious or fearful state. We also risk being too paralyzed to influence what we may actually have control over.

We may also have issues in the Circle of Concern over which we may have some influence if we apply ourselves. These might be situations such as our health, career success, reputation, or our children’s future. While healthy people may still get sick, eating healthy foods and exercising regularly will influence health. Putting in extra effort at work is not a guarantee of advancement but may improve career success. Showing care and concern and following through with commitments may strengthen one’s reputation. Spending quality time with our children when they are young could likely enhance their future. These are the types of concerns you could move to the Circle of Influence .

Proactive people who focus on expanding their Circle of Influence tend to be energized and positive as they endeavor to improve areas of their lives over which they can exert some control. This expansive effect on your Circle of Influence shrinks your Circle of Concern. The more energy you put into your Circle of Influence, the more you will feel in control of your life, and the more your fear and anxiety will diminish, allowing you to feel more whole, clear, conscious, and calm. This is the space where you can hold the high vibration of Love and compassion. Focusing on your Circle of Influence allows you to be empowered and make good decisions amid chaos and helps you stay connected to your Inner Being and your Inner Wisdom for guidance. People who can maintain a high vibration have a healing effect on others and the world simply by holding the vibration.

This doesn’t mean we are unconscious of the concerns we can’t control, or we don’t respond to them. We take it one step at a time. If you want to respond with power, first, you must enlarge and strengthen the Circle of Influence in your own life, so you are centered, grounded, and have the inner strength to respond accordingly in a way that is best for you.

How to expand Your Circle of Influence and Shrink Your Circle of Concern

First, take a break from the news, including alternative news and social media, and find ways to connect more with the natural world.

Make a list of things you value most in your life. These may include things like your health, financial stability, friendships, the environment, more time alone or more time to relax, more fulfilling work, creative outlets, or more time with your family. Become clear about what is most important to you. You may not know precisely how to achieve these things or know all the answers to solve the concern, but these will likely be things you have some control over.

Choose one to three most important to you, and then brainstorm a plan for how you can either create it or make it better than it is currently. Writing it down has a much more profound effect on your energy than simply thinking about it. Thoughts float in and out of your mind, where writing grounds your system, making you more calm and sure of yourself. The act of writing is the first step for making it real. Having an emotional investment in your chosen items will create the passion necessary to manifest them and keep you focused and motivated.

Position yourself as the human creator and start taking tangible action steps to make your plan a reality. These can be baby steps or big steps. Whatever you can do to get yourself focused on your circle of influence, the calmer and more empowered you will feel and the better your life will be as a result.

Next time you feel fear, anxiety, or anger, pause and think about this simple model and ask yourself, “In which circle do I have my focus and energy right now? You will see that it’s the Circle of Concern at some level. As soon as you shift your focus back onto the Circle of Influence, you will immediately feel relief. Sustained focus and investment into your Circle of Influence will make you feel more certain, confident, clear, strong, empowered, and much more capable of responding to the things you don’t have control over in a way that is best for you.

A Native American Legend:

One evening, an elderly Cherokee
told his grandson about
a battle that goes on inside people.
He said, “My son, the battle is between
two wolves inside us all.

One is Evil ~
It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed,
arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority,
lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.

The other is Good ~
It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility,
kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity,
truth, compassion and faith.”

The grandson thought about it for a minute
and then asked his grandfather:
“Which wolf wins?”

The old Cherokee simply replied,
“The one you feed.”

Which one are you feeding?

Watch for the April blogpost for more practical tools to cope with anxiety and fear .

Love and Connection

Sat, 12 Feb 2022 17:25:54 GMT

The Wisdom and Tools for Relationships

By guest blogger, the brilliant Nancy Rae, Certified Health Coach and Life Coach

February is the month of love. Valentine’s Day prompts many people to celebrate and honor their closest relationships with gifts, flowers, chocolate, and dinner out at a favorite restaurant. If you celebrate with your significant other, family, friends, or even by yourself, it is a special time to focus on love and connection. I invite you to consider deepening your awareness, understanding, and application of the concepts of love and connection now and throughout the year. When you learn how to purposefully cultivate these aspects in your relationships—with others, yourself, and your Higher Power—they will flourish beyond what you could possibly imagine.

About three years ago, I lost my marriage. I felt utterly shocked, devastated, and abandoned. Immediately, I sought out as many resources as I could find to help me make sense of what was happening. I worked with multiple therapists, coaches, and spiritual counselors; I read books and listened to audio programs about relationships and marriage. I prayed, journaled, meditated, and prayed some more. I worked on deep forgiveness for my husband and myself. I was seeking any sort of explanation of how our marriage of 26 years could have washed away right before my eyes. I honestly thought our marriage was one of the strongest of anyone we knew. Of course, there were bumps in the road here and there, but nothing that seemed out of the ordinary for a mature relationship like ours. In my desperate quest for solace and understanding of what on earth happened, my eyes were opened to some amazing wisdom and a set of tools that can powerfully deepen the love and connection of any relationship, making it not only phenomenal, but also formidable. Sadly, it was too late for me to save my marriage. But I vowed to myself that when my heart healed, I would set out to help others salvage, strengthen, and thrive in theirs. I learned along the way that this wisdom could be applied not only to marriage, but to all kinds of relationships to help them prosper.

Marriage

It may be startling to learn that only a very small percentage of marriages are mutually satisfying on a deeply connected level. According to marriage guru Mort Fertel, most marriages are “mediocre at best or dying a slow death.” People find it easy to “fall in love,” but as the relationship matures and life happens, the sparks quit flying, and the relationship can start running on autopilot. That might work for a while, but it’s likely to veer off course a bit or run completely out of gas over time. Some people unwittingly decide that they are no longer compatible with their partner, and they don’t realize this erroneous conclusion is not actually the problem. But unfortunately, we’re not taught how to “build love” after the honeymoon period is over in a relationship.

The good news is that there are specific things you can do with your partner to create love in your marriage and maintain that love for a lifetime. One simple tool to help build love in your marriage is to reprioritize your relationship with your spouse. You likely have a career, family, friends, and hobbies that also demand your time. Focus on connecting to your mate above all these other roles in life, and you will notice a dramatic difference in the level of your satisfaction. You’ll also discover that a purposeful, loving connection to your spouse will enhance the way that you relate to your other priorities in life, as well.

Relationships with Family, Friends, Colleagues, and Community

As human beings, one of our greatest needs is to be in relationship and communion with others. Love and belonging ranks third, just above safety, on Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. It feels wonderful when our interactions with people are loving and fun, but we’ve all experienced relationships in our lives that are much more challenging. Even in relationships that typically go well for us, there can be moments (or weeks, months, or even years) that test our patience and possibly leave us wondering if the relationship is worth the effort to maintain. In this situation, it helps to reflect on the analogy of a rock tumbler. The rocks represent each of us in our relationships, and as we bump up against each other, we smooth out our sharp edges. If it weren’t for us being in relationship with others, we wouldn’t be able to transform into our brilliant, shiny potential. The rock polishing correlation can help us shift our perception of any difficult situation with others. We may think, “If only so-and-so would change, everything would be better,” but simply changing our perception about the person or the circumstance is really what is needed most. Strive to see the best in them—the shiny rock that is their true self.

Another powerful tool to iron out any wrinkles in a relationship is to focus on connecting instead of needing to be right. In the big picture, the connection between you and the other person matters much more than getting your way. This can be a difficult task because our ego thrives on being right. Heighten your awareness of when your ego is trying to win and extend goodwill instead.

Relationship to Your Self

Your relationship with yourself is one of the most essential connections in your life, yet most people give it the least attention. You might feel arrogant or self-centered to honor your own needs, and maybe you feel altruistic in putting yourself last. I invite you to let go of any discomfort in loving yourself and affirm that you deserve to be loved; you are worthy of self-love. Let go of mistakes you’ve made and forgive yourself. Spend time connecting with your soul and be open to discovering more about yourself.

One beneficial way of connecting to your inner self is through a specific journaling technique. In the book The Power of Your Other Hand , author Lucia Capacchione, Ph.D., suggests writing questions to yourself with your dominant hand, then answering the questions with your non-dominant hand. She says this taps directly into your creativity and inner wisdom. Consider using this technique while asking yourself the following questions:

• How could I show up more as my authentic self in life?

• Is fear holding me back from being all I am meant to be?

• Is there some inner wisdom I have been avoiding because it might push me out of my comfort zone?

• What areas of my life could use some attention or fixing?

• How can I love myself more?

Pave a path of connection to yourself and find out how self-love amplifies the love you give to others.

Relationship to Your Higher Power

I remember years ago thinking how great it would be to have my very own personal coach available at my every whim to help me with any aspect of my life. If I needed guidance with my health—my coach would know the answer. Parenting question—ask my coach. Navigating absolutely any area of my life—my coach would instantly have me covered. Then I literally laughed out loud at myself because I realized that I already had a “personal coach” to guide my every thought, word, and action in life. I’m pretty sure God had a good laugh, too!

The truth is that we all have this “personal coach” available to us. We may not all have the same name for our Higher Power, but It is present for us anytime, day or night. We must choose to plug into that Power, though, and make our spiritual relationship a priority. If you don’t already have a spiritual practice, try affirming each morning upon rising that Spirit is dwelling within your heart and mind, guiding your thoughts, words, and actions every minute of the day. Then sit in gratitude and silence for a bit and feel the warm, loving embrace of Source. As the day goes by, tap back into communion with your Higher Power as often as you can, listening for Its guidance and affirming Its divine love expressing through you. Then be open and receptive to all the nudges and serendipities which guide you to your highest good—that’s your Personal Coach guiding your every step. Nurture your relationship with God through love and connection, and the pieces of your life will slip into place with ease and grace.

Click here to learn new wisdom and tools to optimize love and connection in your relationships—in your marriage, with others, with yourself, and with your Higher Power.

Nancy Rae is a Certified Health Coach and Life Coach and received her training from the Institute for Integrative Nutrition. She is board certified with the American Association of Drugless Practitioners. She has a Master’s degree in Education and is also trained in Conscious Discipline and Infinite Possibilities, which greatly support her role in guiding others. Her most cherished role in life is being the mother of four amazing sons.

Click here or go to NancyRaeCoaching.com to learn more about Nancy and her services.

What's Wrong With My Will?

183:799260884 (Susan Newman) — Sun, 23 Jan 2022 00:50:24 GMT

How to Do Inner Work

Did you make a New Year’s resolution? Are you still on track?

I can't lie. I've never been one to make New Year's resolutions. The idea of doing it makes me feel weak and depleted, and it appears I have no will to do it. So, what’s wrong with my will?

Statistically, I’m not alone. According to a 2016 study, of the 41% of Americans who made New Year's resolutions, only 9% felt they were successful in keeping them. In 2020 only 27% of those surveyed even made resolutions.

I discovered many articles with advice on why our resolutions fail and how to stick to them. Reasons for failure included our goals being too lofty, too overwhelming, too vague, creating a financial burden, or taking too much time. We may also fail in meeting our goals because our goal is not exciting or interesting to us, or we've set them because we think we ought to. But then we beat ourselves up or throw in the towel when we lose interest or feel discouraged. We may also fail if we don't have a system to hold us accountable, say, a partner with like-minded goals.

Pragmatic solutions were provided to resolve these points. For example, stop obsessing over your past pitfalls and focus on the here and now. Set smaller goals with smaller time frames. Pick goals that are interesting or exciting to you. Make your goals specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, and time-bound. Get a partner who will be a positive support and won't drain you or become competitive. Congratulate yourself on small steps and give yourself the compassion and support that you would give a friend.

Harnessing Our Inner Power

Seems like some good advice, but can you see how all of these relate to some external action — outer work ? While there is nothing wrong with setting goals to establish new habits, lasting significant change in our lives depends on our understanding at a deep level the reasons we operate the way we do. It's imperative to discern why we stay locked in self-sabotaging or self-limiting behaviors that resist change and then commit to a deeper level of change. We must change our consciousness before our behavior can change. This requires inner work .

A great chasm exists between our outer and inner powers. It seems we must pay dearly for our material achievements. Our goals may start out as stimulating. But as we become enmeshed in them, the demands on our energy, mental functions, emotions and will make life more complicated and exhausting. Ironically, we often become victims of our achievements.

The only way to offset this danger of losing control in our efforts is to develop inner powers through inner work. Unfortunately, our culture does not teach us that inner work is even a thing to know, understand, or do. I could write a whole book on this topic, but for today I'll focus on one of the most fundamental and potent inner powers—WILL. This is unrealized in most of us.

Will is a power at the core of our being. The function of will is to decide what is to be done, apply the necessary means for its realization, and persist in the task in the face of all obstacles and difficulties. But will doesn’t necessarily work when we intellectually impose a goal on ourselves for some established time.

It’s our challenging experiences, circumstances, and relationships that activate the power of our will from within. In his book, The Act of Will , Roberto Assagioli, M.D. writes, “When we are actively wrestling with some obstacle or coping with opposing forces, we feel a specific power rising up within us; and this inner energy gives us the experience of ‘willing.’”

The Point of Choice

As this power rises within us, a point of choice becomes apparent. Every human has two sets of dynamic energies that can act at this instant and guide our choice.

One we could call power . Power appeals to the part of human nature we consider noble, arises from meaning and principle, and is associated with supporting life itself. It is expansive and allows us to use our will and intentions to move out of pain, judgment, and uncomfortable feelings into a state of awakened, expanded, balanced expression. This power impels us toward wholeness and the full functioning of all our innate capacities with confidence in the face of whatever the external world presents. This energy spirals us upward.

The other we may refer to as force . By definition of the basic laws of physics, force is always met with a counterforce that is always limited, separating, and polarizing. This force is contractive and causes us to cling to a false sense of safety and defensiveness. These are coping patterns to deal with fear, anger, shame, or blame that we established during early life as a protective response to trauma and/or unmet needs. It causes us to hang on to the past or be afraid to take chances or jeopardize what we already have. This energy spirals us downward.

We may need help uncovering and correcting our lack of resonance with our basic needs for safety, belonging, love, respect, and self-esteem, which prevent us from achieving our goals.

Breaking the Glass Ceiling

This force that holds us back can also be activated by a fear of pushing through a glass ceiling to our upper limits. Part of what we need to identify and heal is our hidden fears.

We hold back because we may fear we are fundamentally flawed and believe we don’t deserve success and happiness.

We may fear that if we succeed, we’ll leave those we love and care for behind. We unconsciously feel like succeeding would be disloyal, and success would make us feel guilty. Or, if we have greater success, those we love may abandon us , and we could end up alone.

Another unconscious fear is that success may bring greater burdens to ourselves and others.

If we’ve been bound and constricted, we may be afraid of the expansiveness of independence and freedom that comes with success.

A common fear among talented and gifted individuals is that shining too much will make others feel less than or look bad. So, we put the proverbial bushel basket over our light.

I have and am currently resolving some of these hidden fears and know firsthand how challenging it can be to overcome them. Most of us have internal upper limits that qualify the amount of success, love, abundance, and health that we allow in our lives. There may be behavioral reasons that block our success, but most issues are found within. In the end, sustaining happiness and success is an inside job.

We Are Designed to Grow

The good news is that everyone is imbued with an intrinsic desire to grow and become everything we can be despite obstacles. Within us is a mechanism for attempting to grow regardless of conditions or difficulties which have impeded our natural growth.

Some people also have an innate drive or motivation to move beyond their current situation, releasing all pain and judgment and moving to higher levels of awareness, understanding, and knowing. This type of motivation is actually our natural state. Children exhibit this with their joy in discovery and play. This type of motivation is seen in people inspired by the endless delight of learning, exploring, and growing, which leads to feelings of peace, joy, and infinite generosity.

The extent of our growth depends on how much we are willing and able to peel away and release inhibitions, unconscious patterns, and constraints on our inner nature so that we can truly be our radiant selves. We can take all the well-advised steps in the world, but without addressing the hidden motivations for our behavior and cultivating our inner powers, our desires and goals may remain unreachable.

Ask Yourself WHY?

Philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche wrote, “He who has a why to live for can endure any how .”

If you have felt that sense of will activated within yourself and you want to optimize its potency to achieve your goals, the best step is to aim to deeply understand why you desire this goal and what motivates you to achieve sustained progress. If you don’t know why you are doing something, it’s hard to handle the set-backs, and a crisis of a loss of purpose may ensue. One needs a sense of purpose. Meaning and purpose in life is not found in objects, people, or activities but rather in the pursuit of them.

Everyone has a soul that yearns. Everyone has a soul that is rich and seeking. Your fulfillment in life will be determined by how well you choose goals that match your soul’s desire and execute your commitments to see them through. In this context, a commitment is falling in love with something and then building a structure of behavior around it for those moments when love falters. These structures help us stay in line.

Don’t think of these structures as restraint. Instead, think of them as providing the freedom of capacity . For example, the freedom of playing the piano entails tying yourself down and practicing every day.

When you make these commitments, you improve your character. For example, when you have a child, and you’re off for the weekend, rather than doing your own thing, you choose to play with your kid. And in that way, you cultivate your character.

Worldly success and spiritual fulfillment have a peculiar relationship. Jesus said it’s harder for the rich person to enter the kingdom than the poor person. Because the lives of the poor and hungry are broken, they have the capacity to receive. They also tend to be much more generous than the rich person. They have the empathy of knowing what it is like to suffer so they are able to share what little they have. They often have a resource deep down inside for an incredibly rich kind of life that we who are better off can learn from.

In 1883 poet Emma Lazarus wrote in her sonnet for the Statue of Liberty welcoming the homeless to the shores, “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free…” This epitomizes the idea that spiritual fulfillment often involves endeavors of going to the margins and accompanying or finding solidarity with the people there.

How to Work with Your Inner Self

Journaling by hand (not typing on the computer) is a powerful healing mechanism and one of the most profound ways to access your inner self. Ask yourself these questions and consider journaling your answers:

Is my goal characterized by a soul yearning?
Why am I truly seeking this goal?
What purpose would this goal serve?
Will my goal enrich or fulfill my life?
Will my goal directly or indirectly fulfill the lives of others?
How will my commitment to this goal enrich my character?
How will commitment to this goal grow some capacity in me which inevitably makes me feel free?

Then intend to contact your own soul’s wisdom to proactively address your greatest fears about reaching this goal. Consider journaling to allow your subconscious to answer the following questions about your greatest fears that thwart your attempts. Then proactively address what comes up by responding to yourself as though you are an all-loving parent writing the words to encourage and counsel the child within to believe in themselves.

What is in the way of believing I am truly worthy of living my goal? (These beliefs probably came from your childhood when your needs weren’t met).
What is in the way of believing that I actually deserve it?
What is in the way of believing I will be able to handle other people’s reactions when I finally achieve what I long to do?
What burdens do I believe I may encounter if I achieve my goal?
What fears do I have if I become independent and free with my success or my world becomes much bigger?
How have I put a bushel basket over my light?

If:

You struggle to make headway beyond coping with life circumstances
You are unable to fulfill your yearnings and ambitions
You are motivated to actualize your potential, talent, or fulfillment of a life's mission and want to expedite achieving your highest, most rewarding goals

Work with me to clear hidden patterns and programs, resonate with your heart’s desire, and live and experience the highest version of yourself.

Tis in ourselves that we are thus or thus. Our bodies are our gardens to the which our wills are gardeners. ―William Shakespeare, Othello

The Magical Art of “Taming”

183:799260884 (Susan Newman) — Fri, 10 Dec 2021 16:02:48 GMT

The Nuances of Giving and Receiving

‘Tis the season of giving. Many of us are making our lists and checking them twice to be sure we are fair in our giving. But what is the real meaning of giving?

The Shadow Side of Giving

The idea of giving is highly complex and ambiguous. Many of us hold unconscious, non-coherent perceptions of giving. It’s widely misunderstood that giving is “giving up” something or putting oneself in a position of being deprived. Some are willing to give, but (often unconsciously) only in exchange for receiving goods or affection. If receiving does not occur, one might feel cheated.

In other cases, it may be painful to give, as some see giving as a virtue in the sense of sacrifice. According to social psychologist Erich Fromm in his book, The Art of Loving , “They feel that just because it is painful to give, one should give; the virtue of giving to them lies in the very act of acceptance of the sacrifice.” They live by the norm that it is better to give than receive and may unconsciously resonate with the idea that it is better to suffer deprivation than to experience joy.

The Light Side of Giving

Another way to look at giving is through the perceptual lens of coherence. Giving in this case, as described by Fromm, “is the highest expression of potency. In the very act of giving, I experience my strength, my wealth, my power.” When we feel this heightened state of vitality and potency, we experience ourselves as overflowing, alive, and joyous. In this case, giving is more joyous than receiving.

The most important sphere of giving is not of material things but of the human realm. At the highest level, the human gives his life to others. This doesn’t mean that we sacrifice our life. We give what is most alive in us: our joy, interest, understanding, knowledge, humor, even our sadness—all expressions and manifestations of that which is alive in us. By giving our life in this way, we enrich the other person and enhance the other’s sense of aliveness.

When our giving brings something to life in another, it’s reflected back to us as we experience enhanced aliveness. Then it seems as though the other also gives as we share in the joy of what we have brought to life. This idea of giving and receiving can be exemplified by “the teacher who is taught by his students, the actor who is stimulated by his audience, and the psychoanalyst who is cured by his patient.”

Love—The Most Potent Gift

The most potent power given and received is love. A while ago, I tried to understand this concept because many of my clients, friends, and even myself, at times, had seen ourselves as loving but felt unloved. I wanted to truly comprehend the meaning behind giving to receive, especially love.

Metaphysically, I understood the concept through the Law of Attraction. When you believe, feel, and affirm your abundance strongly enough, you can give freely, knowing it returns back to you, naturally—it’s law. It’s the idea behind tithing. Luke 6:34 says, “Give, and you will receive. Your gift will return to you in full—pressed down, shaken together to make room for more, running over, and poured into your lap. The amount you give will determine the amount you get back.”

But that doesn’t necessarily work for everyone and can be perceived as giving in order to receive. Several nuanced explanations address how this tenant is misunderstood and therefore fails to come to fruition for many, and I will address that in a future blog article. For the purpose of this topic, I wanted to truly understand the deepest meaning of giving and receiving love.

My Revelatory and Mystical Experience Related to Giving and Receiving

My preferred method for receiving insight is to close my eyes, connect with Spirit, and ask to be shown. I usually see images or symbols. As I closed my eyes, I immediately saw the sun and its rays while simultaneously knowing and feeling myself as a ray.

To describe our oneness with God, I’d once heard the analogy that God is like the sun, and we are its rays. Just as a ray of sunlight cannot separate from the sun, we can not separate from our source. What is one can never separate. The sun, as Source, extends itself through its rays. The rays of the sun (all of us) carry its Source wherever it shines.

I’ve really loved this analogy and thought I thoroughly understood it. So, I was confused why this image came to enlighten me about how giving love enables one to receive love.

Then I remembered that I not only saw the sun and its rays but could feel myself as a ray. In my mind’s eye, I stepped out of the ray so I could look at “myself.” There was my ray, not in the glory that I would have expected, but dense and sporadically covered with all manner of junk items: an old washer and dryer, broken tools, bits of unrecognizable stuff. The ray appeared to be magnetizing these things, albeit with a weak magnetic force. Oh my gosh! That’s not what a ray is supposed to do! It’s not supposed to pull things to itself—especially junk! It extends the love and the light of its source! Mine was exerting effort—and in the wrong direction!

I repaired the image by sloughing off all the junk with a brush of my hand and stepped back into my ray. Suddenly, I felt Source powerfully flowing through every part of me, effortlessly extending infinitely outward. The feeling was indescribable! The immensity of the Love flowing through me in that mystical experience taught me the quintessence of how giving IS receiving. We give as we surrender to allow the Love and the Light to flow through us, extending out from us. In so doing, we receive unlimited abundance of Love. We do not give in order to receive something in return. At this level of awareness, giving, in and of itself, is exquisite joy!

This spiritual understanding may enlighten your giving and receiving, or it may be a little too obscure to land for everyone at this moment; so, some nuts and bolts of effective giving and receiving may be helpful.

The Elements of Giving

Fromm explains that the active elements of giving common to all forms of love include care , responsibility , respect , and knowledge . “Love is the active concern for the life and the growth of that which we love. Where active concern is lacking, there is no love.”

Ideas for the gift of love by giving care :

Share your food with them.
Save the last/biggest piece of dessert for them. Give them your last chocolate.
Take them out for a surprise meal.
Send flowers for no reason.
Give a spontaneous hug. Give a compliment. Say, ‘I love you for no reason.
Send or give them a card to say thank you or let them know you are thinking of them.
Put a note in their sack lunch.
Plan a surprise trip away. Buy someone a ticket back home if they live away.

“Care and concern imply another aspect of love; that of responsibility . Responsibility, in its true sense, is not duty but an entirely voluntary act; it is my response to the needs, expressed or unexpressed, of another human being. To be ‘responsible’ means to be able and ready to ‘respond.’”

Ideas for the gift of love by giving through responsibility :

Make them your priority, even when life is busy.
Make them a cup of tea or cook their favorite meal without being asked.
Ask if they’re OK. Listen if they need to offload.
Offer to help with the cleaning, especially a chore you know they hate or do a chore without being asked.
Offer to pick them up from work when the weather is bad.
Run them a bath.

“The third component of giving love is respect . Respect is not fear and awe; its root (respecere = to look at) means the ability to see a person as he is, to be aware of his unique individuality. Respect means the concern that the other person should grow and unfold as he is…to grow and unfold for his own sake, and in his own ways, and not for the purpose of serving me. If I love the other person, I feel one with him or her, but with him as he is, not as I need him to be as an object for my use.”

Ideas for the gift of love by giving respect :

Take an interest even if the subject matter isn’t interesting to you.
Watch their favorite film/TV program even though you’re not a fan.
Take an interest in something you know they like, such as a sports team or the theater.
Say thank you.
Apologize readily.

“To respect a person is not possible without knowing him; care and responsibility would be blind if they were not guided by knowledge. Knowledge would be empty if it were not motivated by concern…Knowledge that penetrates to the core is possible only when I can transcend the concern for myself and see the other person in his own terms.”

For example, when I really know another, and he is angry, whether it’s obvious or not, I realize it’s not really anger, but anxiety or worry or loneliness or guilt. When I know him deeply, I recognize the suffering person rather than an angry one.

Ideas for the gift of love by truly knowing them:

Learn their love language, then act on it.
Spend quality time with them, even when your life is busy.
Truly and actively listen. Ask questions to get more perspective from the other.
Plan dreams together and set future goals.
Reminisce about past memories together.
Create a playlist filled with their favorite songs.
Buy them their favorite treat just to surprise them.
Send them a video or picture they would think is funny when you know they need cheering up.
Buy a little present that reminds you of them or that you think they might like.

Lessons from The Little Prince

“Just that,” said the fox. “To me, you are still nothing more than a little boy who is just like a hundred thousand other little boys. And I have no need of you. And you, on your part, have no need of me. To you I am nothing more than a fox like a hundred thousand other foxes.

But if you tame me, then we shall need each other. To me, you will be unique in all the world. To you, I shall be unique in all the world....”

“What does tamed mean? It’s something that’s been too often neglected. It means to create ties.”

“You are beautiful, but you are empty. One could not die for you. To be sure, an ordinary passerby would think that my rose looked just like you --- the rose that belongs to me. But in herself alone she is more important than all the hundreds of you other roses; because it is she that I have watered; because it is she that I have put under the glass globe; because it is she that I have sheltered behind the screen; because it is for her that I have killed the caterpillars; because it is she that I have listened to, when she grumbled, or bloated, or even sometimes when she said nothing. Because she is my rose.”

“It’s the time you spent on your rose that makes your rose so important...People have forgotten this truth, but you mustn’t forget it. You become responsible forever for what you’ve tamed. You’re responsible for your rose.”

“Please tame me!” he said.

“I want to, very much,” the little prince replied. “But I have not much time. I have friends to discover, and a great many things to understand.”

“One only understands the things that one tames,” said the fox. “Men have no more time to understand anything. They buy things already made at the shops. But there is no shop anywhere where one can buy friendship, and so men have no friends anymore. If you want a friend, tame me.”

“What must I do to tame you?” asked the little prince.

“You must be very patient,” replied the fox. “First, you will sit down at a little distance from me—like that—in the grass. I shall look at you out of the corner of my eye, and you will say nothing. Words are the source of misunderstandings. But you will sit a little closer to me, every day...”

Give those you love the gifts of your care , responsibility , respect , and truly knowing them. Tame those you love, and you can’t help but feel love.

Ho’oponopono: Simple Steps to Healing

183:799260884 (Susan Newman) — Tue, 21 Sep 2021 02:46:45 GMT

A Lesson from a Doctor

Who Healed the Criminally Insane

An Embarrassing Memory

My adult daughters were over for dinner and cards the other night. We had a fun time reminiscing and laughing about their childhood escapades. I share with lightness because they were all pretty well-behaved kids, and I didn’t have to discipline much. Claire was compelled to retell a story that was funny in retrospect, but of which I’m not particularly proud.

She and her older brother Anders were probably 4 and 6 at the time. I don’t recall the specific extenuating circumstances, except that they had been unusually rowdy and wouldn’t cooperate with my requests all afternoon. In all likelihood, I was distracted by a project or a deadline. In frustration, I lost my temper and told them they would get a spank (not previously part of my disciplinary repertoire).

Anders shouted for Claire to run, and he led the way as they bolted to his bedroom, where they clambered up to his top bunk. I’m embarrassed to admit it, but with steam coming out of my ears, I went after them. When I tried to grab either of them to get them down, they scrambled to squeeze their little bodies between the mattress and the wall! As I chided for them to get down, NOW, all they could do was laugh and grunt as they tried to maneuver and maintain their defensive position. Humiliated, I threw up my arms, gave up, and walked away.

That was an uncharacteristically trying day. I’m sure I was most upset with myself, but I may have believed the kids’ behavior caused my upset.

This story seems nebulous compared to the difficulties many encounter at the hands of other individuals, groups, or institutions, from simple slights and selfishness to neglect or intentional harm, even unimaginable. No one is exempt from experiencing hurt or setbacks in their lives caused by a rift in a relationship or by the words or actions of a perfect stranger.

While we can take total responsibility for what we think and do, we have no power over other people’s hurting attitudes, words, and actions….

OR DO WE?

Healing the Criminally Insane

The legendary healing work of psychologist Dr. Ihaleakala Hew Len came to light when Dr. Joe Vitale, best-selling author and personal development guru, caught wind of his story and contacted him to learn his method firsthand. According to their co-authored book, Zero Limits , Dr. Len cured a complete ward of criminally insane patients of a Hawaiian state hospital without ever seeing them.

This ward was quite dangerous and not a pleasant place to live, work, or visit. The staff felt unsafe. Fearing attack from patients, they would walk with their backs against the wall, often called in sick, or simply quit. Turn-over was high.

According to the account, for four years, Dr. Len studied the files of each inmate then looked within himself to see how he shared responsibility for creating that patient’s illness. Then, holding each file, he would work on himself. As he improved himself, the patients improved and began to heal. Many went off medication, and others were released. Staff enjoyed coming to work, and absenteeism and turn-over disappeared.

Dr. Len’s approach used a Hawaiian healing and cleansing method called Ho’oponopono, a potent forgiveness and healing process taught by Hawaiian spiritual leaders or Kahunas based on healing through forgiving and loving oneself.

The roots of the Hawaiian word are hoʻo (to bring about) and pono (rightness). Repeated syllables, as in ‘ponopono,’ often express an emphasis. Traditional Ho’oponopono centers on relationships and a sense of community, and communal feelings of responsibility toward an issue. One person’s issue is considered everyone’s issue. Practiced as long as Hawaiians can remember, the process can take a day or, in some cases, years until a resolution is found that can be accepted by all.

The teaching of Dr. Ihaleakala Hew Len has become well-known in healing circles outside the traditional Hawaiian cultural practice. It propagates the idea of using the Ho’oponopono as a self-focused, mental cleansing method based on four mantras:

I love you.
I’m sorry.
Please forgive me.
Thank you.

Dr. Len explains that “total responsibility for your life means that everything in your life—simply because it is in your life—is your responsibility. In a literal sense, the entire world is your creation.” This means that anything you experience and don’t like, such as your difficult neighbor, a selfish friend, a political leader you can’t stand, or a vicious terrorist you see on the news, is up for you to heal. In a manner of speaking, they only appear to exist and are actually projections from inside you. “The problem isn’t with them; it’s with you, and to change them, you have to change you.”

This concept is tough to grasp, but I invite you to suspend judgment and disbelief, even if you are skeptical. You have been taught that we are entirely separate from one another. In truth, your mind connects to every other mind and affects everything. I’m sure you’ve had the experience of thinking of someone you haven’t seen or heard from in a while, and you serendipitously run into them, or they give you a call out of the blue. Or you’ve been about to say something to someone, and they say it first.

There are no such things as idle thoughts. All thoughts are active and have impact, and words and actions even more so. Because we all share energy and connection to each other, we can influence that energy positively or negatively for others. Even the slightest actions, positive or negative, can become catalysts for other actions beyond our imagination.

No matter the cause of your upset, the best place to heal the problem is to look inside yourself. It’s really the only thing you can control. Because all minds are joined, your healing becomes their healing. You may or may not see results right away, but healing is still happening.

This is a very radical, almost unbelievable concept, but it has been transformative for me. We all have the power to activate the potential for healing in others by healing our own thoughts, actions, and motivations.

A Profound Dream

Returning to the event I shared in the beginning about my response to my kids pushing me to my limits when they were little, let me continue. Several years later, I had a dream about that very incident combined with a movie I’d recently seen. The film was based on the actual lived experience of the children involved with drug gangs in the slums of Rio de Janeiro in the 1980s. It was brutal. Kids were killing other kids on behalf of the warring drug lords.

In the dream, I was frustrated and cursing under my breath, repeating that humiliating behavior of trying to wrangle my kids off the top bunk to spank them for their misbehavior. Then my awareness went directly to the scene in Rio from the movie where a little boy held a gun against another little boy’s head. Tragically, he pulled the trigger. Immediately, my dream returned me to the same scene of me and my little rascals. Instead of anger, I breathed, remembered how much I loved my children, and gently encouraged them to engage with me in a fun activity. Once again, my awareness switched to the boy with the gun against the other little boy’s head. This time he lowered the weapon.

I cannot begin to convey the profundity of that dream. It was only a few seconds, but it was life-changing. I realized that my choice of action was tipping the balance energetically, either to the detriment of others or even saving a life—and I don’t mean only in my own apparent circle of influence. Our influence is infinitely expansive. Choosing Love over fear—the root of all negative thoughts, attitudes, and behaviors—has a maximal effect that we may never comprehend.

I intended to release all triggers of upset after that profound dream and did so with a modicum of success. However, when I discovered the Ho’oponopono, I had a concrete formula to address situations and people I felt had wronged me or caused my anger, frustration, worry, disappointment, and regrets.

Whenever I’m triggered by the actions or even activated by empathy for the painful problems of others, I realize an opportunity for healing myself has presented itself. I tap into the place where the hurt resides within myself, and with as much feeling as I can, I say the four statements as many times as feels appropriate.

I love you. I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you.

With this process, I’m choosing to be a better me; and because all minds are joined, I know that choice will impact circumstances and people around me and beyond for the better, too. Amazingly, usually after a few times through, I immediately feel a release of negative emotion.

According to this philosophy, we are all responsible for everything we see in our world. We can heal ourselves and the world by taking full personal responsibility and then healing the wounded places within ourselves.

Your neighbor is your other self dwelling behind a wall. In understanding, all walls shall fall down. Who knows but that your neighbor is your better self wearing another body? See that you love him as you would yourself. He too is a manifestation of the Most High . —Kahlil Gibran

From the Library of Nature’s Knowledge

183:799260884 (Susan Newman) — Sat, 07 Aug 2021 23:46:06 GMT

Self Help Techniques

For Mind-Body First Aid

In my last blog post, I delineated in simple terms how quantum mechanics theory explains the mystery of how energy healing creates changes in states of being. Science has proven that we are beings of light. Light exists as both waves of energy (the field of infinite potential) and matter (what we see or experience as real), just not at the same time. How we feel and experience life in our physical reality is determined by our resonance with certain frequencies in the field of infinite potential.

According to Penny Pierce, author of Frequency, The Power of Personal Vibration , we each have our own personal vibration, “which changes depending on what we’re thinking, feeling, and doing. The most important thing to know is that we can influence it. When we choose to attune to the frequency of our soul, our personal vibration stabilizes at our ‘home frequency.’ It is much easier to maintain our clarity when we know how to intentionally focus our personal vibration.”

But how do we do that? We live in chaotic times, both in the macrocosm and in our own little circles of influence. Most people I know, self included, can feel rattled from time to time with extra stress or worry and fear of the unknown. What most don’t realize is that within our being we have access to an amazing self-contained “energy pharmacy.” You can create remarkable shifts in states of being with valuable knowledge of natural approaches, techniques, modalities, or exercises you can practice independently.

In my last blog post, I promised to provide simple strategies and exercises to shift your frequencies so you can experience more coherent, positive states of mind. Below are two exercises to try from Chloe Faith Wordsworth’s book, Spiral Up: 127 Energizing Options to Be Your Best Right Now .

CALMING CROSS-OVERS (releases emotional and environmental stress)

The Calming Cross-Overs position releases emotional and environmental stress and integrates both hemispheres of your brain.

A great time to do this is while lying in bed at night before sleep, in the morning before preparing for the day, whenever you feel upset, worried, or stressed or when you find yourself in the midst of an argument. This technique calms your system down quite profoundly.

Teachers can teach calming cross-overs to their students to do before tests or to manage behavior problems.

How to:

Cross one ankle over the other. (It doesn’t matter which ankle is placed over the other).
Place your hands in front of you, with the backs of your hands touching.
Still, with your hands back-to-back, place one wrist on top of the other, so your palms now face each other. Palms facing, interlock your fingers. Bring the two clasped hands down and in a half circle towards your chest, so your interlocked hands rest on your chest and your elbows are relaxed against your ribs.
Place your tongue on the roof of your mouth, close your eyes and breathe slowly. Relax deeply and feel the layers of tension let go. Often within fifteen seconds, you will feel a profound sense of release.
When this feels finished, and you are ready to release, uncross both your ankles and wrists and place your fingertips together. Allow your fingertips and hands to move in any way they are drawn to: up-down, left-right, and out-and-in. These movements have a synchronizing effect on our upper and lower brain areas, the left and right brain hemispheres, and the front and back brain areas.

CALMING BREATH (calming and healing):

This breath is called the king of all breaths because it balances the brain’s two hemispheres, synchronizing alpha brainwaves in both hemispheres. This breath is practiced widely in India (usually for 10 minutes twice a day) with exciting results in improved health and well-being.

This is a wonderful breath to do when you need to calm your mind and emotions and yet be quietly energized — before a test, giving a speech, or before meditation or prayer when you want your mind to be still and peaceful.

How to:

Put the edge of your right index finger across your forehead, just above your eyebrows.
Now close your right nostril with your right thumb and inhale through your left nostril. Hold your breath with both nostrils blocked while relaxing deeply.
Now open the right nostril and exhale through your right nostril. Hold your breath out with both nostrils blocked while relaxing deeply.
Keep your left nostril blocked and inhale through your right nostril. Then exhale and inhale through the left nostril.
Continue exhaling and inhaling through the right nostril and then exhaling and inhaling through the left nostril. Block the nostrils at the top of the inhale and after the exhale for a few seconds.
When you feel that the breath is complete, relax your arm and breathe normally

We have not only the capacity but also the responsibility to calibrate and recalibrate our ‘home frequency’ so that we may live our highest purpose. — Michael Bernard Beckwith

I will continue to share other self-help modalities in future newsletters. If you are not receiving my newsletters, be sure to sign up, so you continue to receive these valuable tools.

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If a Tree Falls in a Forest...

183:799260884 (Susan Newman) — Sat, 10 Jul 2021 22:11:26 GMT

The Mysterious Underpinnings of Consciousness, Reality, and Healing

You’ve probably heard the riddle, “If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?” What do you think? Does it? Have you really considered the answer?

This riddle is actually a philosophical th ought experiment that raises questions regarding observation and perception. It’s unclear where this came from, but it’s been attributed to the writings of the Irish philosopher George Berkeley in his A Treatise Concerning the Principles of Human Knowledge , published in 1710. For example:

It’s an intriguing thought, and one I had as a little girl when traveling home from having visited my relatives. As I lay in the back end of the station wagon, looking up into the starry sky, I asked my parents if Aunt Joanne and Uncle Andy were still at their house. I didn’t mean, did they leave, too? I meant, if I can’t see them, are they really there? In my six-year-old mind, they weren’t—if I couldn’t see them.

OK, so one of my degrees is in early childhood education, and I’m quite familiar with Piaget’s Object Permanence theory. Object permanence describes a child’s ability to know that objects continue to exist even though they can no longer be seen or heard. This developmental milestone generally takes hold around 8 or 9 months. This, then, becomes the basis on which consciousness perceives and understands the world throughout our lives. Somehow, my six-year-old self questioned that, and frankly, after studying quantum mechanics in recent years, I realize I may have been on to something.

Can something exist without being perceived by consciousness? In the riddle of the falling tree, for example, is sound only sound if a person hears it?

As Berkeley famously coined, “To be is to be perceived.”

Later, in the mid-1800s, the magazine Scientific American corroborated this philosophical idea by providing a more technical answer. “Sound is vibration, transmitted to our senses through the mechanism of the ear, and recognized as sound only at our nerve centers. The falling of the tree or any other disturbance will produce vibration of the air. If there be no ears to hear, there will be no sound.”

So, to be clear, the answer is “no.” If a tree falls in a forest and there is no one there to hear it, there will be no sound.

While sound may not exist if there is no perceiver, the motion of the tree falling will disturb the air and activate air waves . This is a physical phenomenon that can be measured by instruments even when there are no ears to hear it.

While Berkeley and other philosophers through time have contemplated this topic of how consciousness perceives existence (and we could really go down the rabbit hole here), I will segue to how this example of the tree falling relates to the mystery of how energy healing creates changes in states of being. Quantum mechanics is the best theory we have for understanding this. Please, stay with me here so that I can delineate in simple terms.

Returning to the tree example, the action of the tree falling in the forest creates energy. That energy can be measured in the form of waves and also can be perceived as a thing—a sensation, namely sound—provided the waves reach a conscious perceiver (in this case, ears).

Consciousness and “Reality”

Quantum physicists experiment with the tiniest objects in the Universe, atoms and sub-atomic particles, to try to understand the puzzles and paradoxes of the effects of consciousness on experienced “reality.”

They used the apparatus of a famous 200-year-old experiment called the double-slit experiment conducted well before quantum theory existed. Back then, it was used to understand wave behavior and involved shining a beam of light at a screen that contained two closely spaced parallel slits. In this experiment, some of the light passes through the slits and strikes another screen. As the light passes through the slits, they create two light waves that interfere with one another. Where the peaks of the two light waves coincide, they reinforce each other, but where a peak and a trough coincide, they cancel out. This phenomenon produces a series of alternating bright and dark stripes on the back screen, where the light waves are either reinforced or canceled out.

In modern day, physicists performed the double-slit experiment not with light but with electrons—tiny charged particles that are components of atoms. When a stream of electrons passes through the two slits, one would expect that they, as particles, would make a mark as they are deposited on the surface of the back screen in two places right in line with the slits. But they don’t. They form the same pattern as the light waves, producing alternating bright and dark stripes on the back screen. What the heck? These particles acted like waves!

The crazy thing discovered about electrons is that they are not solid little balls; they are quantum objects—partially wave-like and partially particle-like. In the experiment described, they acted just like the light waves.

But here is another really odd thing:

When detectors are placed right at the slits to determine if any given particle is going through the slit or not, the interference pattern seen with the waves as light and dark bands across the back screen completely disappears. Instead, the particles arrive on the back screen in two spots right behind the slits, just as particles would be expected to behave.

The sheer act of observing—applying consciousness—not only disturbed what was to have been measured, it also produced a different reality. In this case, the electrons acted like particles instead of waves.

In essence, if no one or nothing is looking, they behaved as waves. But when observed, they behaved as particles.

When this “observer effect” was first noticed by the early pioneers of quantum theory, they were deeply troubled. This challenged their assumptions behind all science which asserted that we live in an objective world regardless of human interactions with it. If the way the world behaves depends on how—or if—we look at it, what can “reality” really mean?

Let’s return momentarily to the home of the electron, the atom.

Atoms are the building blocks of matter and are the smallest unit of an element that retai ns its properties. Everything in our physical reality is made up of atoms. But atoms are mostly empty space. Each has a nucleus made of subatomic particles and a few electrons zipping around inside the empty space. On closer inspection, however, those electrons are not just speeding around; they’re winking in and out of existence. They momentarily disappear and reappear in another place inside the atom.

Einstein proved that matter and energy are interchangeable (E=mc²). Matter and energy are really different forms of the same thing. The wave is energy; the particle is matter. The particle of matter emerges out of the wave of the infinite field of energy and merges back into the field of limitless potential. The wave is really anything in potential.

Wave = Energy = Frequency = Light

Particle = Matter = Condition = Experience = Circumstance = Relationship

Scientists tried the double-slit experiment yet again. This time they returned to sending a beam of photons of light through the double slits. As expected, they produced the alternating light and dark spots on the back screen, which correlates to the wave pattern. But when they incorporated the detector, the light—which was previously only considered waves—produced a mark on the back screen directly behind the slits, behaving precisely as a particle!

A new revelation: Photons of light are both waves and particles .

With the realization that frequency patterns determine the function and form of matter and our perceived reality, we can more easily understand that all of our problems or symptoms of distress are also determined by our frequency wave patterns.

Popp says that light can either be coherent or noncoherent. Our state of consciousness will determine which. If our light is coherent, we will naturally be transmitting coherent information to every cell in our body, emotions, and minds. It’s all energy. Our physicality is a denser energy; our emotions are a higher frequency; and the mind is an even higher frequency. If our light frequencies are noncoherent, then, of course, noncoherent information will be transmitted to our physical body, emotions, and mind, to our DNA, and all our trillions of cells simultaneously.

So how are positive change and the healing of body, mind, spirit possible?

We may feel like our problems are unchangeable; however, if we look at them energetically as unique frequency patterns, we can positively transform them instantaneously. This is much like changing the station or frequency on a radio or TV to view as a different program within seconds with a remote control. Energy work is the “remote control” that enables us to identify and release negative, discordant, or unhelpful frequency patterns and transform them into positive, life-affirming frequencies.

With the double-slit experiment with the electrons and the photons of light, we saw that the act of inserting consciousness—the detector—changed the reality. Even though a thorough understanding of consciousness has not been completely nailed down, it’s difficult to avoid the implication that it’s somehow linked to quantum mechanics. Physicist Dr. Claude Swanson, Ph.D., and author of Life Force, The Scientific Basis , affirms, “A large body of scientific evidence shows that our minds can affect physical reality.” This realm called consciousness is where change must take place to experience a more whole and healthy life.

A skillful energy practitioner can detect the fields of energy that affect the various realms of consciousness as well as those that permeate and surround the body. These energy fields contain patterns of light and information in the form of wave frequencies, and they exist as potentials before cohering into matter, experience, “reality.” According to quantum physics, objects (as well as conditions, characteristics, circumstances, relationships, etc.) exist as possibility waves, called wave functions , before they show up in our reality . Waves (potential outcome) and particles (what we see or experience as real) cannot be observed at the same time. When a wave function collapses, it then becomes something we can see or experience.

An energy practitioner can use various tools and techniques to identify or measure the wave function of the problem and then allow awareness, focused intent, spiral up energy exercises, and Grace to configure the wave pattern to one of coherence and harmony. Then, the collapse of the new wave function shifts the outcome. The outcome is immediate, but the effects can appear to play out over time, depending on how congruent each person is to experiencing what may seem like miracles. Some observe dramatic and instantaneous results, and others experience a gradual movement toward their desired outcome.

If we want positive change and healing, and we want to heal our relationships, we must maintain or regain coherence in our field of light. Only in this way will coherent information be transmitted to all our trillions of cells, our DNA, our brains, our thoughts, beliefs, and attitudes, which then impact how we respond emotionally and with our behaviors and habits.

Stay tuned for my next blogpost to learn simple strategies and exercises to shift your frequencies and therefore experience more coherent, positive outcomes.

I t will remain remarkable, in whatever way our future concepts may develop, that the very study of the external world led to the scientific conclusion that the content of the consciousness is the ultimate universal reality. –Eugene P. Wigner, a Nobel Prize winner and one of the leading physicists of the twentieth century.

Science cannot solve the ultimate mystery of nature because, in the last analysis, we ourselves are a part of the mystery that we are trying to solve . –Max Planck, known as the father of quantum mechanics

Ancestor Syndrome

183:799260884 (Susan Newman) — Mon, 07 Jun 2021 15:43:52 GMT

The unresolved traumas of our ancestors may be the root of our problems

I have long been aware that generational patterns influence us. Discordant energy patterns and programming can be passed down through multiple generations. Transgenerational transmission of unresolved conflicts, of hatred, revenge, vendettas, of secrets, of what is “unspoken," as well as of premature deaths, and coincidences in time and space are just a few examples.

This concept is found in many verses of the Christian Bible.

Keeping mercy for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin, and that will by no means clear the guilty; visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children, and upon the children’s children, unto the third and to the fourth generation.

—Exodus 34:7- King James Bible

For example:

Succumbing to his fear and insecurity, a young man in Nazi Germany turned in his hiding Jewish neighbors to the Gestapo. The neighbors are subsequently murdered in the death camps. He lived his life telling no one about this and suppressed the shame he incurred because of his dishonorable actions. For his entire life, he experienced emotional pain. Rather than forgiving himself and resolving it, he inflicted it upon others by being cruel and cold-hearted. Because he could not forgive himself, the insidious, discordant energy of shame became programming imprinted in his mind as well as every cell of his body.

The energies of genetic programming of this sort can be passed down through the egg and the sperm for multiple generations. Like genetic predispositions for certain characteristics and constitutions, we too can be triggered by the energetic programming that has been passed down through the generations.

So, for example, a descendant of this man may come into the world with this energetic programming of shame, born not out of his/her own actions, but from that which began with the great-great-grandfather. This programming for shame becomes a point of attraction or a magnetizing factor for the scenarios, situations, or actions that reflect the inherent discordant energy of shame held by the descendant. However, it may manifest itself differently. For example, the descendent may display this shame program by having low self-esteem and being the brunt of mistreatment by others. These patterns can be cleared for all affected generations. The descendent/client can then begin to shape life differently without the underlying pattern of shame guiding beliefs and decisions about life and self.

We may also suffer from identification programming , which relates to how we may see ourselves in relation to another or how we see them. Sometimes, for example, we unconsciously identify with our parents and take on their traits. When the traits are negative, we then see ourselves as negative. Or we may experience inheritance programming , as our genes conform to a set of expectations formed through every day conditioning through observed behavior.

A few years ago, I read The Ancestor Syndrome: Transgenerational Psychotherapy and the Hidden Links in the Family Tree by the internationally renowned French psychotherapist Anne Ancelin Shützenberger. She greatly expanded my simple understanding by providing fascinating insight and myriad examples and case studies collected over four decades of clinical practice. Suffice to say, I could not put it down!

Using a tool called the genosociogram (also referred to as a genogram ), Shützenberger illustrates how her clients have conquered seemingly irrational fears, psychological and even physical difficulties by discovering and understanding the parallels between their own life and the life of their forebearers.

A genosociogram is a family tree that graphically represents and brings important life events and connections to light.

Some examples include: given names, places, dates, landmark occurrences, and major life events such as births, marriages, deaths, critical illnesses, accidents, moves, occupations, and retirement. It also highlights the different types of relations the subject has with their environment and the bonds between them and other people. For example: “Who lives under the same roof,” who “eats from the same dish,” who raises whose children, who runs away and to where, who arrives—through birth or moving in—at the same time another goes away—through death or departure, who replaces whom in the family, how things are shared—particularly through inheritance or donation after a death, who is favored and who is not, as well as repetitions and injustices in the “family book-keeping.”

Then the genosociogram is deepened and enriched by examining: what is spoken and unspoken, and exploring the “gaps” in what has been said, what has been “forgotten,” the splits, the break-ups, the “broken hearts,” the synchronous events, and the coincidences in dates of birth and dates of death, marriage, separation, accidents, the onset of illness, failure in exams, or reconciliation. The genosociogram reveals important anniversary dates in the client’s world, in his family universe, in his social atom, in his social and economic environment, in his personal psychological reality.

Shützenberger shares so many interesting concepts that affect us. Here are a few excerpts:

Family book-keeping Within the collective unconscious of the family line is the family ledger. It keeps track of the credits and debits of all of the members; for example, the justices and injustices, the affections and retributions, the staying or fleeing. Even if one runs away from the family obligations by creating geographical distance, they cannot be free of the family debts. Fleeing can infuse an individual with unexplainable existential guilt. The invisible family ledger notes the debts, obligations, or merits of each member. If the ledgers are not balanced, problems can be passed on from generation to generation.

Invisible family loyalties Unconscious systemic programming of the clan expects its members to be loyal to the thinking, feeling, and motivations of the family unit. Even if a member disapproves of the family’s thinking, feeling, or motivations, they will succumb to the same patterns unless they consciously break the loyalty bond and make concerted efforts to create a new pattern. Patterns of divorce and broken families are an example of this.

Another example might be a brilliant and capable person who fails to succeed in school by not studying or completing assignments. They may be affected by family loyalty because the parents/ancestors were poor, had no more than an 8 ^th -grade education, and were expected to work to support the family. The invisible family loyalty is not to advance, have more abundance, or fulfill dreams beyond those of the family line.

Family Secrets Revealing the truth, even when it is shameful, difficult, or tragic, is better than hiding it, even if the intent is to protect others “for their own good.” What is left hidden, secret, or unspoken becomes more serious in the long run. If the slate is not cleared, the energetic ramifications are then left to be revisited within the family line until it is “brought to light.”

Transgenerational Terror Shützenberger discusses the effects of terror, such as war trauma, where soldiers came within a hair’s breadth of death and felt the “wind of the cannonball” which killed or massacred their buddy or brothers in arms. While some eventually lost all memory of the experience, others were frozen to their souls with “unspeakable” terror. The shock wave that hit them was seemingly transmitted to certain descendants who are sometimes frozen to the bones (Raynaud’s Syndrome) or feel sick, experience anxiety, throat constriction, or nightmares during specific anniversary periods. The unfinished mourning becomes somatized (manifest as physical symptoms) in descendants.

My Own Family Case Study

Reading this last explanation put me on high alert. My daughter Claire had developed the symptoms of Raynaud’s syndrome shortly after she turned 20. Her feet would become numb and white at the onset of winter, even when the weather was not overly cold. I did not have access to any information that would help me fill out a genogram, but I did have my dowsing ability and a fair aptitude for inner sight.

As I often determine during my Holofield Healing or Resonance Repatterning sessions, I muscle-checked for the number of generations and on which side the original terror was established. I determined that the trauma was rooted 12 generations back on her father’s side. The trauma pattern followed only the men of the generations until that twelfth, and that was a female.

I closed my eyes to “look” at the scene. I saw a young woman, also about age 20. It was snowy as she returned to her village to discover something horrific had happened to her three children. I could not see them, but it felt as though they had all died, killed during her short absence. I also saw a young man, perhaps a teenager. I sensed it was her younger brother. He had some responsibility but was not the cause of whatever horror had befallen the family. I intuited that the children were under his care while their mother was away. But in his immaturity, he was distracted and left them unattended.

I was guided to figure out the time period, so I estimated what it might be, given 12 generations. Then I muscle-checked for the exact date. I knew that the family line originated in Sweden, so I googled “the year 1740 in Sweden.” I was stunned at what I discovered! At the top of the timeline for that year was “The case of Christina Johansdotter.” While it was not the story of Claire’s ancestor in question, it explained what must have happened in the life of that twelfth-generation ancestor.

WARNING: The following italicized excerpt is disturbing. Feel free to skip this part if you are sensitive.

The case of Christina Johansdotter was brought before the court in Stockholm in 1740. She was accused of having murdered the infant of a friend by decapitating it with an axe. She was unemployed, clearly depressed, and had isolated herself socially for some time.

Christina freely admitted her crime and openly declared that she was guilty of what she was accused of. She clearly explained her motive to the court. She had been deeply in love with her fiancé, and when he died, she had lost all will to live and wanted to follow him to the grave. She had often contemplated suicide, but as the church taught that suicides go to hell, she would never see her fiancé again if she did so, as he was surely in heaven.

At a loss as to how to solve this predicament, she witnessed the decapitation of a woman sentenced for infanticide, and the solution became clear to her. The murder of an adult did not always lead to a death sentence, but the murder of a child always did, and after having confessed and repented their crime, even murderers were forgiven for their sin. She therefore decided that she would do this, confess, repent and be executed, and finally see her fiancé again, and thus they would be reunited in heaven.

With this intent, she went to a friend, asked her to lend her infant (with the purpose of showing it off to an acquaintance on a visit from the country), took it outside and chopped its head off with an axe. The punishment for the murder of a child in Sweden at this time was decapitation, after which the corpse was to be publicly burned at the stake.

Cases such as this were common; to murder a child was a common method used by many suicidal people. The reasons for this were religious. The contemporary religious belief was that suicide would send the soul to hell; however, an executed person who confessed and repented his/her crime was believed to go straight to heaven. Children were not just ideal victims because they were easy prey due to their disadvantage in size and strength, but also because they were believed to be free of sin and, thus, did not have to receive absolution before death in order to go to heaven. In 18th century Sweden, the wish to commit suicide was the second most common reason for murdering a child, surpassed only by unmarried women suffocating their newly-born infants.

These suicide-executions represent quite a peculiar historical phenomenon, which developed its own customs and culture. At the end of the 17th century, executions were given a solemn character in Stockholm; the condemned and their families bought special costumes, which were to be white or black and decorated with embroidery and ribbons, and paid for a suite to escort the condemned to the place of execution at Skanstull.

The authorities greatly disapproved of all this, as the purpose of an execution was to put fear in people, a purpose which was destroyed by these theatrical performances, which, according to the government, gave the audience sympathy for the condemned suicidals, especially if they were female.

To remedy this, the government issued a new law to abolish this execution-culture and restore the intended deterrent effect of executions. The new law was put into effect in 1754, fourteen years after the execution of Johansdotter and in the middle of this execution culture. After this, everyone suspected of committing murder with the motive of suicide by execution was to stand on the scaffold for two days with the crime stated on a board and whipped, and taken to their execution blindfolded.

This did not have much effect in reality; King Gustav III of Sweden even contemplated replacing the death sentence with life in prison for female child murderers, simply because they were given such sympathy at the executions that the punishment did not have the intended deterrent effect.

The prevalence in mid-1700 Sweden of suicidal women killing children, confessing, and repenting for the sole purpose of being executed in lieu of suicide, and thus, granted entrance into heaven, gave me the clues I needed. I could understand the transgenerational terror that was manifesting physically in Claire’s symptoms. Imagine being frozen in one’s tracks of “unspeakable” horror upon discovering that your children had been victims of such a crime. Shützenberger explains how anniversaries, such as turning a certain age, and environment/place can activate the “Ancestor Syndrome.” Claire turning 20 and the onset of winter may have been the activation for her.

As with many victims of unresolved, unspeakable terror, the energy is trapped in the body-mind system and the individual remains inward, unable to fully express themselves and be free of the torment. This unresolved trauma energy, active in the family unconscious is telescoped to generation after generation. Even when the unspeakable event such as this is unknown to the descendants, it’s influence can become somatized (manifest as symptoms in the physical body) or manifest as substance abuse, addictive behaviors, or inability to connect deeply with others, just to name a few.

As Claire and I discussed her experience before this writing, she said the symptoms have diminished but are not entirely gone. I had only brought my discovery to Claire’s consciousness before. Writing about this has shed new light on it. I didn’t consider exploring the energies of the brother of this ancestor. I can imagine the profundity of horror and guilt that must be there. I’m eager to explore more deeply and clear this with Claire and all the generations in a session.

By “digging” deeply into the life stories we have known or heard of our ancestors, we can search for and excavate the hidden, unconscious links and bring significant understanding and meaning to the troubles of our life experiences. If you’d like to explore your own genogram, numerous software is available. Wondershare EdrawMax has an excellent free version if you’d like to try it out. See: https://www.edrawmax.com/genogram/genogram-maker/

The unresolved traumas of our ancestors are stored in the family collective unconscious. If genogram discovery does not alleviate your conditions or patterns, consider Holofield Healing or Resonance Repatterning to find the unconscious root causes and clear them.

It is liberating to consider that when we heal an ancestral pattern, we are not only freeing future generations, but healing backwards through time, liberating all those souls who were left unresolved, unforgiven and misunderstood.

— Belonging: Remembering Ourselves Home by Toco-pa Turner

“You’ve always had the Power, my dear…”

183:799260884 (Susan Newman) — Tue, 13 Apr 2021 22:05:06 GMT

...You just had to learn it for yourself.”

This is what Glinda, the Good Witch of the North, tells Dorothy at the end of her journey in the Wizard of Oz. Dorothy tries in vain to please the “great and powerful Wizard of Oz” so he will help her return home. But, when all attempts fail, she beseeches Glinda to help her. Glinda explains the Power is and always has been within her.

This story, replete with meaning and symbolism, uses the idea of “home” to represent our home frequency, our natural personal vibration , which, according to Penny Pierce, author of The Power of Personal Vibration , “changes depending on what you’re thinking, feeling, and doing. The most important thing to know is that you can influence it. When you choose to attune to the frequency of your soul, your personal vibration stabilizes at your ‘home frequency.’ It is much easier to maintain your clarity when you know how to intentionally focus your personal vibration.”

Like Dorothy, how often do we acquiesce, give away our power, think we are at the mercy of our circumstances, and look for material means of support? We may neglect to connect with whatever we consider our Higher Power, or even if we do, believe that God is not listening or answering our prayers when our problems do not abate.

As a child, I’d learned in Sunday School that we humans were “made in God’s Image.” Back then, I believed that God was an old man in the sky, watching me all the time, sometimes bestowing me with good fortune, and other times not. I don’t recall ever being given that description specifically, but I know it’s an archetypal belief, taken for granted and accepted by masses of people. It’s also a reason some have rejected the idea of a Higher Power, especially the one named “God.” Whatever the case, I’ve come to realize that that’s us making God in our image. Nonetheless, this belief may remain subconscious even if more high-minded theological views take its place.

While this belief is fodder for a much larger discussion, I want to parse out the meaning of being made in God’s Image as it relates to our immense ability to create (or miscreate) in our lives with the phenomenal power of the Conscious Mind.

Harnessing the Amazing Power of Your Conscious Self

As my views of God (Spirit, Source, Creator, Love, Life, The Universe, The Divine, Infinite Wisdom, High Self—I use these terms interchangeably) have evolved, I have aligned myself with powerful understandings.

First, God is the Source and Creator of all there is, all good, and present everywhere. This is the Force of Love and Wisdom that underlies all of existence. All of Life is interconnected in unity and Oneness.

I understood my relationship with Source more clearly through spontaneous imagery, where I saw The Divine as the Sun and us as the Rays. Where does the sun end and the rays begin? They are inextricably One. In this analogy, the Rays (us) are a creation — an endless, eternal extension of the Sun (Creator). Simply, we are the manifest idea and thoughts of God extended infinitely.

As spiritual beings , we are inherently good, created in the image and likeness of The Divine, endowed with the qualities and attributes of Spirit. With this understanding, we can see how we also create our life and our experiences with our ideas and by what we choose to think, feel, and believe. This is a vast topic for exploration, but suffice to say, our consciousness is ALWAYS extending and endlessly creating.

In my last blog post, I described the various levels of consciousness, which all play a part in creating our experiences. The work I do with clients addresses the more subtle and less accessible levels of consciousness: the subconscious and the unconscious aspects. Each of us, however, holds complete dominion over our conscious minds . In my previous post, I promised to address how we might recognize patterns that block the effectiveness of our conscious mind and solutions we can use to correct them. I described it:

The conscious mind, or middle self, is our ego-self, our adult aspect. It is the part of our mind which we most identify. It intellectualizes, is logical, and reasons abstractly. It is the decision-maker, providing order and clarity of direction in life. Willpower comes from the conscious mind. Spiritually speaking, when we pray, we construct our desires and requests from the level of the conscious mind.

Unfortunately, we rarely use the facilities of the conscious mind with mindful intent to create what we desire. Most people don’t know how. We can use prayer and meditation to keep us aligned with the One Great Power in the universe. But let me be clear, prayer is not just a religious or spiritual, reverent act. It is absolutely ANY thought you hold at EVERY given moment. Thoughts have creative power and frequency to determine and attract experiences of like frequency. Our thoughts transmit energy, and whether we are aware of it or not, our thoughts attract in kind.

Barriers and Solutions for a Healthy Conscious Mind

The Barrier of Negative Thinking: How are you using your brain ?

We often misuse our thoughts. If we spend our energy focused on negative beliefs and feelings, we will experience adverse results, even if we or others pray for us. Sometimes people pray for certain outcomes, like that they will be healed from a disease or find the partner of their dreams, then spend the rest of the time dwelling on fearful or negative thinking or talking about the worst possible outcome. Or, as another example, when someone prays for a job and then complains to others that they have no job or can’t find one, they undermine their prayer.

It is natural that by knowing what you do not want, you are able to clarify what you do want; and there is nothing wrong with identifying a problem before beginning to look for a solution. But many people, over time, become problem oriented rather than solution oriented, and in their examination and explanation of the problem, they continue the perpetuation of the problem. That which is like unto itself, is drawn—so tell the story you want to live and you will eventually live it.

—Abraham-Hicks

The Barrier of Endless Affirmations: Are you finding your courage ?

Prayer or intention is also ineffective when it is accompanied or followed by endless affirmations. An overuse of affirmations is really expressing the energy of fear and doubt and the need to work hard to make something happen. Once your prayer or intention has been given to the One who cannot fail, your practice is to remember and wait with thankful knowing and neutral anticipation. Does the farmer plant the fields and then distrust the harvest will come?

People will say, “Well, I have to work on my goals,” or, “I have to work on my visualization.” And we want you to think more about holding the vision because it is pleasurable to hold the vision, not because you’re trying to make the vision work in order to get to some place that you’re not now standing. “How much should I work?” We would say, work in the sense of joyously moving forward. —Abraham-Hicks

The Solution of Positive Visualization and Faith

Engage the power of positive visualizations and plan your future with faith that you will be provided with limitless possibilities for your greatest good. Give thanks with the authentic feeling that your desired outcome has already happened.

You do not have to have money to attract money, but you cannot feel poor and attract money. The key is, you have to find ways of improving the way you feel from right where you stand before things can begin to change: By softening your attention to the things that are going wrong, and by beginning to tell stories that lean more in the direction of what you want instead of in the direction of what you have got, your vibration will shift; your point of attraction will shift—and you will get different results. —Abraham-Hicks

The Barrier of Emotion: What does your heart tell you about your thoughts?

The conscious self can be tricked by the Low Self (subconscious mind) into confused living when it is engulfed by emotion.

Any time you have physical discomfort of any kind, whether you call it emotional, or physical pain within your body, it always, always means the same thing: “I have a desire that is summoning Energy, but I have a belief that is not allowing so I’ve created resistance in my body.” The solution, every single time, to the releasing of discomfort or pain — is the relaxation and the reaching for the feeling of relief. —Abraham-Hicks

The Solution of Paying Attention to Your Emotions

Emotions are a direct response to our thinking. For example, when we worry, our thoughts are projected into the future for what might happen. We mistakenly believe that if we keep thinking about it, we’ll solve our perceived potential problem. But focusing on the issue or potential problem does not solve it; instead, it conjures up negative emotion, which keeps us from our clarity of mind so true inspiration and solutions can arise. Remain in the present moment. Breathe deeply and focus on the action of your breath. Realize how right here, right now, you are actually just fine.

The Barrier of Failing to Request Help: Have you forgotten who you really are?

We may continue to experience difficulty when our conscious aspect lacks the desire to, or fails to, request help or guidance from a Higher Power (God, High Self, or whatever name you prefer). We have forgotten our place, One with Dog....I mean, One with God! ; - )

The Solution of Actively Surrendering Our Problems

With practice, we can skillfully employ the power of our Conscious Mind to produce results. But we cannot always achieve the Peace of mind or find the solutions we desire without aligning ourselves with Source. Because we have free will, we cannot just expect that Spirit is “looking out for us.” To Spirit, we are perfect because we are God’s creation. It is up to us to bring the shadow, as we perceive it, to Light by acknowledging and surrendering our problems to whatever we consider a benevolent Higher Power. It’s not that we don’t go into action, but if we don’t ask for Divine guidance to “shed Light” on our problem, we may never receive the perfect inspiration we need to go into right action.

It is not enough to understand spiritual teachings in this regard. We must live the Truth we know as powerful and creative beings by wielding the power of our conscious mind. Hold your thoughts in the certainty that you are being led to your highest good despite temporary appearances. Consider if you must change your thoughts or put more power or intensity into your thoughts and believe in the guidance you are receiving. As Michael Bernard Beckwith states in the Forward of Pierce’s book, “We have not only the capacity but also the responsibility to calibrate and recalibrate our ‘home frequency’ so that we may live our highest purpose.”

You are the only one who creates in your experience—no one else. Everything that comes to you comes by the power of your thought. If there are changes you would like to make, it will be of great value to begin telling a different story—not only about your body, but about all subjects that have been troubling to you. As you begin to positively focus, getting to feel so good about so many subjects, you will begin to feel the power that creates worlds flowing through you.

—Abraham-Hicks

Home is a place we all must find, child. It’s not just a place where you eat or sleep. Home is knowing. Knowing your mind, knowing your heart, knowing your courage. If we know ourselves, we’re always home, anywhere. —Glinda, The Good Witch of the North

To receive FREE inspirational daily guidance in working with your Conscious Mind, I highly recommend signing up for Daily Quotes from Abraham-Hicks HERE and listening to Abraham-Hicks Daily Podcasts HERE .

Images from 1940 Castell Brothers, The Wizard of Oz Card Game

We Are More Than We Know

183:799260884 (Susan Newman) — Wed, 03 Mar 2021 04:48:26 GMT

Consciousness and Our
Multi-dimensional Self

Wellness that is being allowed—or the wellness that is being denied—is all about the mindset, the mood, the attitude, the practiced thoughts. There is not one exception in any human or beast, because you can patch them up again and again, and they will just find another way of reverting back to the natural rhythm of their mind. Treating the body really is about treating the mind. It is all psychosomatic. Every bit of it; no exceptions. —Abraham-Hicks

This quote typifies the core philosophy behind the energy work conducted at Holofield Healing. Sometimes the reason for allowing or denying wellness is hidden from us, at least consciously, and our attempts for feeling healthy, happy, and prosperous elude us or only work temporarily despite our best efforts. It matters not if your experience of pain or difficulty relates to:

Health problems or pain
Emotional well-being or self-esteem
Anxiety, fears, or phobias
Addictions
Relationship issues
Career challenges
Blocks to creativity, prosperity, or abundance
Dealing with difficult decisions
Having clarity of life purpose and living your passion
Spiritual growth

We are looking for its source in the mind. But what exactly is the mind, and how do we treat it?

The truth is that the answers and solutions lie, quite literally, within us. We are so much more than we know: more than our bodies, more than our brains, more than our personalities or DNA. We are even greater than our consciousness. That greatest aspect of our being, The Essential Self, is absolutely perfect, unlimited and far vaster than the tiny, individualized expression we call our lives. It never suffers, nor is it diminished, ever, no matter what our small self experiences. The more that the small self aligns with the Essential Self, the more we release pain and judgment, have clarity of vision, understanding and knowing, feel peace and joy and endless generosity, and end the cycle of suffering.

A key to finding the answers to our seemingly inexplicable conditions, behaviors, and experiences, and to breaking the barrier between our small self and our Essential Self is to explore the different realms of our consciousness and correct any energy patterns and programming found there that keep us from our highest good.

The Conscious Mind: The Middle Self

The conscious mind, or middle self, is our ego-self, our adult aspect. It is the part of our mind with which we most identify. It intellectualizes, is logical, and reasons abstractly. It is the decision-maker, providing order and clarity of direction in life. Willpower comes from the conscious mind. Spiritually speaking, when we pray, we construct our desires and requests from the level of the conscious mind.

The Superconscious Mind: The High Self

The superconscious mind, or high self, is that parent-like aspect that is loving, trustworthy, and immeasurably wise. It is incredibly advanced in mental powers and creativity. It is the part of our spirit connected to the Divine and whose purpose is to manifest our hearts’ desires and answer our prayers. When we are open and free of energetic obstruction, it also lights our way and gives us direction, meaning, and inspiration.

The Subconscious Mind: The Low Self

The subconscious mind, or low self, on the other hand, is like a child. It has limited reasoning power and cannot distinguish between what is real and what it perceives, nor discern whether information is helpful or destructive. Even though we are not aware of it, the subconscious mind continuously monitors and records all our daily thoughts, words, and experiences—the positive and the negative. It is the seat of all our feelings and holds our chaotic and uncontrolled emotions. It can be fickle, stubborn, or even secretive and can refuse or undermine the conscious self.

The caveat to experiencing our heart’s desire is that the intentions that come from our conscious mind must pass through the subconscious mind, becoming altered with any negative programming before reaching the superconscious mind. Then the superconscious mind manifests the messages it receives, often not in the form at which our conscious intent originally designed them.

Like an iceberg, nine-tenths of which is hidden under water, the unconscious perceptions with which we resonate are equally well hidden. We unwittingly program our subconscious mind, as everything we experience is filtered through our perceptions, which are colored by our attitudes, beliefs, values, morals, ethics, and intentions. All too often, what others have thought, said, or done to us and especially the negative thoughts we have about ourselves and others, particularly when charged with emotion, are imprinted in the subconscious mind. This programming can contribute to allergies, depression, illness, accidents, and inappropriate choices or behaviors and can interfere with our relationships and our ability to succeed in the world. Dramatic or traumatic experiences such as accidents or abuse can also profoundly contribute to programming. Whatever the cause, we will continue to replay and re-experience the negative programming unless the associated energy patterns are cleared from the subconscious.

Unfortunately, however, we cannot reason with the subconscious. It is like a tape-recorder, and no amount of talking about it, or to it, or bringing forth the understanding of how or why the programming got there in the first place will cause the negative or unhelpful programming and patterns to go away. These programs that cause and perpetuate limitations all have unique energy frequency patterns. These discordant or non-coherent frequencies can be identified and then transformed without requiring the process of delving into the details and reliving the painful stories of our lives.

The Unconscious Mind

While the subconscious mind contains our own perceptions, beliefs, and memories, also at play is the collective unconscious, a part of the unconscious mind, shared by a society, a people, or all humankind, that is the product of ancestral experience. It incorporates patterns of memories, instincts, and experiences common to all humanity. These patterns are inherited and contain such concepts as science, religion, and morality. They are often arranged into archetypes and are observable through their effects on dreams as well as behavior, character traits, etc. Our ancestors’ memories, beliefs, and traumas can also be passed down as energetic patterns for many generations.

The Akasha

Looking at the unconscious mind from a spiritual perspective, an even more hidden aspect of the unconscious realm is called Akasha or the Akashic Records. The word “Akasha” comes from two ancient Sanskrit words, “Aka,” which means a space, a storage place, or a repository, and “Sa,” which means sky, hidden, or secret. A simple translation of “Akasha” is “an unseen space or storage place.” Every known spiritual tradition has referred to the concept of the Akashic Records, although it is referred to by different names like the Cosmic Mind or Universal Mind and the Eye of God or Word of God. The most common reference is “The Book of Life,” found numerous times in the Old Testament of the Bible. This realm of consciousness exists everywhere and contains the vibrational record of all experiences and all knowledge that has ever or will potentially ever exist in the future. Every thought, word, and action that every soul has ever had throughout its existence is held as a vibrational pattern here. These frequency patterns can have a tremendous effect on our current life experiences.

How Holofield Healing Treats the Mind

Through all of my various training and practice, I have become highly proficient with tools that allow me to detect the fields of energy that affect the various realms of consciousness. Once identified, I interpret intuitive information regarding the energetic blocks that are the root-causes of your issues. Then I request that High Self clear them, so your small self comes more into alignment with your Essential Self. This raises the potential that you will shift to more coherent, more helpful, more harmonious patterns that potentially yield conditions that feel rooted, nourished, and wholesome. This process allows for more growth, wellness, awareness, clarity, ease, creativity, and abundance in all life areas.

To be clear, I am not doing the healing; it is you, aligning your small self and Essential Self with Divine Source. As the facilitator, I am merely connecting, requesting, expecting, and receiving with heartfelt gratitude. Only the patterns you are ready and willing to change will surface during a session.

Stay tuned for my next post to learn some of the ways we create patterns that block the effectiveness of our Conscious Mind and solutions you can use to correct them.

Science and the Multi-Dimensional Heart

183:799260884 (Susan Newman) — Sun, 07 Feb 2021 22:52:49 GMT

Releasing Trapped Emotions Around the Heart

February is the month we dedicate to Love, celebrating our beloveds we hold dear in our hearts. More cards are sent this holiday than any other besides Christmas. Ain’t love grand! Oh, you have no idea! From an energetic point of view, love is the most powerful force of creation. It is the energetic substance out of which everything is created. While we may not consider Love’s ultimate source, we intuitively know and feel it—either abiding in the heart or absent there.

Let’s look more closely at this amazing organ.

A few days after conception, the embryo forms a clump of vibrating cells that becomes the new heart. It would seem that life begins with the beating of the heart, and it ceases when it is no longer able to maintain its life-giving rhythm.

But the heart is more than a physical organ. The heart is multidimensional—the intersection of the body, mind, and spirit. In many traditions, the heart is believed to be the seat of our spirit, our conscience, and our unconscious and subconscious mind.

The word and idea of the heart are ancient and revered. Three thousand years ago, King Solomon, through his wisdom and understanding of human nature, said: “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life” (Proverbs 4:23). Ancient Egyptians held reverence for the heart above all other organs. When a king or pharaoh died and was prepared for burial, all his organs were removed and placed in clay vessels to be entombed with the body, except for the heart, genitals, and brain. The heart and genitals were considered essential for the afterlife, so they were placed back in the body. The brain, however, was thrown away.

Today, most people assume that the brain is the most essential part of the body. Using a non-invasive medical measurement tool, researchers have discovered that the brain’s magnetic field can be measured an inch or so beyond the head. But the heart has a magnetic field about twelve feet in diameter! They’ve also discovered that when you feel love or affection for another person, your heart waves become apparent in the other person’s brain waves, and your heart rates will synchronize. You are literally sending electromagnetic energy from your heart to theirs.

The heart is an organ of perception. Research conducted by the HeartMath Institute suggests the heart is an access point to a source of wisdom and intelligence that we can call upon to live our lives with more balance, greater creativity, and enhanced intuitive capacities. They observed that the heart seems to have a mind of its own, significantly influencing how we perceive and respond in our daily interactions. Through numerous research studies, the HeartMath Institute found that an optimal physiological state they dubbed heart-coherence is associated with increased mental clarity, cognitive function, self-regulatory capacity, emotional balance and stability, and resilience, as well as creativity, intuition, and personal effectiveness.

Anyone can develop heart coherence to feel calmer and clearer, healthier and happier, with beneficial energy levels and improved performance. Important to know is that coherence automatically occurs through positive feelings. These include compassion, caring, love and gratitude, and other states of appreciation. In contrast, we can quickly become incoherent when we experience negative attitudes and emotions. These may include anger, fear, and anxiety.

The following exercise is a simple method proven to help develop a state of greater coherence at will. We can use this technique much like an energetic defibrillator to stop the inner chaos, opening the heart to be receptive to receive all the goodness available.

With practice, you can use it to manage your stress, promote feelings of well-being, and be present for increasing periods of time without conscious effort.

The Quick Coherence Technique

Create a coherent state in about a minute with these simple steps.

Step 1: Heart Focus – Focus your attention on the area around your heart, the area in the center of your chest. If you like, place your hand over the center of your chest to help keep your attention in the heart area.

Step 2: Heart Breathing – Breathe deeply but normally. As you inhale, feel as if your breath is flowing in through your heart, and as you exhale, feel it leaving through this area. Try to imagine that the energy in your head is now flowing down into the heart. Continue breathing through the heart slowly and casually, but a little deeper than normal. Keep your focus there and continue breathing with ease until you find a natural inner rhythm that feels good to you.

Step 3: Heart Feeling – As you maintain your heart focus and heart breathing, activate a positive feeling. Recall a time when you have felt a sense of love or appreciation. One of the easiest ways to generate a positive heart-based feeling is to remember a special place you’ve been to, perhaps in nature, or the love you feel for a close friend or family member, or treasured pet. Or breathe the feelings of love and gratitude. This is the most important step.

Practice several times each day to promote health and a sense of well-being. In time, this practice will profoundly deepen your state of coherence. This is a great technique to use anytime you feel a draining emotion, such as frustration, irritation, anxiety, or stress. Using it at the onset of less intense negative emotions can prevent them from escalating and bring you back into balance more quickly. Another good time to use this technique is before transitions, like before meetings, going into work, coming home, and especially before important communications.

You can use the quick coherence technique anytime, anywhere, with eyes open or closed. It creates positive changes in your heart rhythms in less than a minute, sending powerful signals to your brain to improve how you feel. Quick coherence can also be used whenever you need more coordination, speed, and fluidity in your reactions.

For more information, visit the website of the HeartMath Institute -- https://www.heartmath.org/

Could Your Heart Be Living in a Bomb Shelter?

183:799260884 (Susan Newman) — Mon, 01 Feb 2021 21:58:25 GMT

Releasing Trapped Emotions Around the Heart

February has become synonymous with the month of Love and the symbol of the heart. Besides celebrating our loved ones, the whole month is distinguished as American Heart Month and is dedicated to motivating Americans to adopt healthy lifestyles to prevent heart disease. A healthy heart is essential for vitality and for life itself.

Most people only see the heart as a muscle that pumps our blood and maintains circulation. But the heart is not just physical; it is multidimensional. The area of the heart is also an energy center. We feel the energy of higher quality emotions associated with the heart, such as love, gratitude, caring, optimism, and joy. We can also feel the lower frequency emotions of grief, sadness, loneliness, isolation, and depression.

Heartache and heartbreak can be the most profoundly painful emotions of the heart. So much so that the subconscious can use trapped emotions in the body to build an energetic wall around the heart to protect it from further heartache or heartbreak. This protective mechanism is a lot like living in a bunker or bomb shelter. It may be helpful in the short-term when the bombs are falling, but living there long-term would cause you to miss out on the joys of life. A “heart wall” is the same concept.

Trapped emotions in the body may come from earlier experiences in life or are established in the womb by picking up the mother’s energies (in most cases, but the energies can come from others). The trapped emotions may also be inherited from our parents from a trauma that may go back several generations. Emotions such as fear related to impending life on Earth or grief associated with leaving “Home” with God (or Source or Spirit, whatever name you prefer to use) may have been established and lodged in the spirit-body before conception. Whatever the cause, even though we may not be feeling heartache because the heart wall conceals it, this energetic condition may manifest as:

• Depression or numbed emotions

• Disconnection from others

• Lessened ability to give and receive love

• Neck pain or shoulder tightness

• Lowered immunity

• Repeated bouts of infection and difficulty healing in general

• Heart and respiratory problems

Whole person health means we address all aspects of our multi-dimensionality. Contact me to see how Holofield Healing can address your issues of the heart.

Woo-Woo Gets Cred

183:799260884 (Susan Newman) — Thu, 31 Dec 2020 04:56:45 GMT

The Science of Energy Psychology

About 23 years ago, I witnessed the most profound healing of a loved one through energy work, similar to my current protocols. This was a crystalizing event for me, and it catapulted me into my energy practice. At some point, I will write about the details of this awe-inspiring experience as well as others.

When I first learned this work, I couldn’t get over how profoundly impactful it was for myself, my family, and my first clients. But I kept it on the “down-low” because it seemed a little woo-woo and wasn’t the kind of thing in which a suburban homemaker (at least in my neck of the woods) involved herself. But I couldn’t help myself; I was compelled. My clients found me through word of mouth, but few came from my personal circles or even knew of my burgeoning practice.

One time at a ladies’ party, one of the leaders in the community, a lovely, talented, out-spoken acquaintance, approached me saying, “I’ve heard from the grapevine that you are doing some sort of...um...I don't know...work that I’ve never heard of. Can you explain it to me?”

I would have expected myself to constrict with panic, stumble over my words, and brush it off or change the subject to avoid the proverbial “stink-eye.” But with unexpected calm candor, words of eloquence and precision flowed from my lips that seemed not to come from me. More and more ladies began to gather round; my inexplicable poise remained undaunted as I continued. When I finished, buoyed by the profundity of the explanation that came through me, I was confident I had established a reasonable baseline of conceptual understanding. I felt at peace. The questioner held her arms out wide and exclaimed that she had a VERY large radar screen...but she was sorry because this just wasn’t on it. Instantly, everyone scattered; I suppose to avoid witnessing my embarrassment. I wasn’t embarrassed, though. My only regret was I was unable to say, “Try moving your radar detector in a different direction.”

That was a long time ago, and since then, science continues to validate this work. It’s become more commonplace, utilized by the mainstream, and in conjunction with allopathic medicine. Many forms of energy work are available under the umbrella of Complementary and Alternative Medicine (CAM). My practice is most aligned with the specific field of Energy Psychology (EP). According to ACEP (Association for Comprehensive Energy Psychology),

Energy psychology (EP) is a family of integrative approaches to psychotherapy, coaching, and healthcare treatment rooted in mind-body healing traditions that are up to 5,000 years old. EP methods blend the bio-energetic insights of these traditions with the best of contemporary psychological practice and have been refined through 35 years of modern clinical experience with millions of clients throughout the world.

Energy psychology gently and swiftly releases traumatic events that are frozen in time in the body-mind system. These events can negatively influence how a person sees the world, experiences and regulates emotion and relates to other people.

Embracing what modern physicists and ancient wisdom traditions know, energy psychology acknowledges the role of bio-energetic systems within and between people as important determinants of health and well-being, illness and pathology.

Energy psychology practitioners combine cognitive interventions (including focused awareness and mindfulness, imaginal exposure to traumatic memories and cognitive reframing) simultaneously with the stimulation of one or more of the human bio-energy systems such as meridians, chakras and biofields.

This powerful combination facilitates rapid positive change and optimal psychotherapeutic outcomes and is aligned with the latest findings from neuroscience and traumatology. With over 50 research studies to date, EP meets the criteria to be designated as evidence-based treatment.

Quick Facts Regarding the Science Behind Energy Psychology

Over 200 review articles, research studies and meta-analyses have been published in professional, peer-reviewed journals. This includes:

65 randomized controlled trials
50 clinical outcome studies (all except one of the above 115 studies document EP effectiveness)
5 meta-analyses
4 systematic reviews of EP modalities
9 comparative reviews (EP and other therapies) (all reviews document EP effectiveness)

The evidence base for energy psychology continues to grow in quantity and quality (methodological rigor). And multiple research studies document the efficacy of EP methods for:

Pain
Anxiety
Depression
Food cravings
Trauma and PTSD
Peak athletic performance

There are over 400 identified forms of psychotherapy, many of which have little or no research to validate them. Energy psychology is both evidence-based and in the top 10% in terms of published research for psychotherapy modalities.

Visit energypsych.org/research to view and access a comprehensive list of studies.

This spring I will be embarking on my own research in the field. I will keep you apprised as I firm up my plans, as I may be offering a program or service to be tested in my research. Stay tuned!

The Backstory

Mon, 21 Dec 2020 04:00:39 GMT

Let me introduce myself.

I hail from the warm and friendly heartland of America. My mother, a teacher, and my father, a captain in the Iowa State Patrol, instilled in me a strong work ethic, meaningful values to lead a principle-centered life, and an awareness to treat others with honor and respect. After attending college, my high school sweetheart and I were married and made our home in the Kansas City area, where we raised our son and two daughters, who are now young adults.

Putting aside early but serious aspirations of pursuing a career as a professional ballet dancer or getting a degree in art, I opted for a more pragmatic route. I received two degrees in education: Early Childhood Education and Elementary K – 9. I taught at the preschool, elementary, and junior high levels for nine years and worked in rural, low-income, urban, and wealthy suburban settings. I learned a lot! During this time, I immersed myself in the emerging fields of brain research and the elements of effective instruction. I was intent on raising the likelihood that my students would maximize their learning potential. I loved crafting the art and honing the skills embodied in master teachers.

When our second child was born, I accepted a position with Kansas State University as a student-teacher supervisor, a career that would give me more time at home with my young children. For another nine years, I worked with young teachers as their on-the-job mentor, instructor, and evaluator. This experience taught me how to discern why some teaching approaches worked and others did not and reflect on the more subtle influences of affect, body language, tone, and energy (one’s “vibe”) that played in the effectiveness of a teacher. Indeed, there was this X-factor to exceptional teachers, which was more than an accumulation of smartness, honed technical skills, and an aptitude for working with young people. I would later learn in my studies with energy that the X-factor has to do with a high level of coherence or a balanced and harmonized personal field of energy.

With this work, I also learned to be honest and direct with people, speak the truth with diplomacy in a way that could be received, and influence positive change. Again, I later learned from my studies with energy that I was successfully, albeit unwittingly, working from the field of the heart. These experiences and understandings have transferred to all kinds of situations, conditions, endeavors, and relationships in my life. Now in my work, I assist all types of people, not just teachers, to increase the coherence of their own pulsating fields of influence and create positive change.

Then, New Territory…

“According to your maps, the world of thought is coterminous with your culture. It ends at the border of your culture, and if you venture beyond that border, you simply fall off the edge of the world. Tomorrow we’ll screw up our courage and cross that border. And as you’ll see, we will not fall off the edge of the world; we’ll simply find ourselves in new territory.” -- Ishmael by Daniel Quinn

A dear friend introduced me to the world of energy, spirituality, and the exploration of “realms not seen.” I had never heard of these concepts before, and at first, I found it all a bit unsettling. I didn’t want to be gullible, but I could not quit thinking about them despite my resistance to believe these concepts could be real. I read and studied every book on the subject that came into my awareness. I chewed on the concepts, accepting some, and rejecting others. I found others who were equally passionate, and I participated in discussion groups and went to lectures. I even went to a variety of energy practitioners myself and experienced my own profound healing and growth. Then I was compelled to take classes in SRT (Spiritual Response Therapy) and became a certified practitioner in 2000. Since then, I have trained in all manner of energy modalities throughout the country with some of the most renowned experts in the field.

This led to one of my most profound learning and growth opportunities: attending Holos University Graduate Seminary from 2016-2018, culminating in my ordination through All Faith’s Church of Spirituality and Health. It was there that I was able to fully integrate universal principles of energy medicine, spirituality, and holistic health through self-development, scholarly exploration and research. Now, at Akamai University in the CAM (Complementary and Alternative Medicine) Doctoral Program, I am completing my studies and research, specializing in Energy Psychology.

I am keenly interested in spirituality, psychology, and quantum physics and am fascinated to witness the convergence of science and spirit. My work has evolved into a powerful “consciousness technology” which I have named Holofield Healing, and it appears to be a remarkable vehicle for transformation. My great joy is to bear witness as my clients align with their Essential Self and entrain to higher levels of coherence, wellness, harmony, clarity, and peace.

Field Notes

Chaos and the Caterpillar

Our Hidden Purpose is to Transform

and be Reborn as a Butterfly

The Physics of Fear

A Path Out of Fear, Anxiety & Anger

Love and Connection

The Wisdom and Tools for Relationships

What's Wrong With My Will?

How to Do Inner Work

The Magical Art of “Taming”

Ho’oponopono: Simple Steps to Healing

From the Library of Nature’s Knowledge

If a Tree Falls in a Forest...

The Mysterious Underpinnings of Consciousness, Reality, and Healing

Ancestor Syndrome

The unresolved traumas of our ancestors may be the root of our problems

“You’ve always had the Power, my dear…”

...You just had to learn it for yourself.”

We Are More Than We Know

Consciousness and Our Multi-dimensional Self

Science and the Multi-Dimensional Heart

Releasing Trapped Emotions Around the Heart

Could Your Heart Be Living in a Bomb Shelter?

Releasing Trapped Emotions Around the Heart

Woo-Woo Gets Cred

The Science of Energy Psychology

The Backstory

Let me introduce myself.

Consciousness and Our
Multi-dimensional Self